how to fall in love - jercy

22 - never enough

j.g.

"are we at the cafeteria yet? i want meatballs!" leo whined as we trudged through ikea. piper's getting a new apartment and is in the market for a new desk.

"i think we're lost, man," i said, squinting at the tiny map. "we're all the way in the kitchen section."

"hey, me and leo were thinking about hitting up some bars. wanna join?" piper asked. "it's this way, by the way."

we go through a short cut door and emerge into the office section. piper begins to study the desks.

"when?"

"friday?" piper suggests.

"can't, i'm having dinner with percy's parents."

"saturday?"

"no, that's movie night for percy and i."

"who the fuck is percy? am i missing something?" leo demands.

piper and i stop walking and glance at each other and then back at him.

"oh yeah. never told you."

"you didn't tell leo?" piper laughs.

"tell me what?"

"percy's my boyfriend. i met him the night i ditched you at a bar." i tell him with a straight face.

"what? and you're telling me now?"

"i thought you'd make a huge deal out if it if i told you that i ditched you to spend the night at some guy's place." i confessed.

"no offense, but jason hasn't exactly been keeping it from you. you're just unobservant." piper said as she measured the width of a white desk with a tape measure.

"b- wh- nevermind. i can't believe you got a significant other before me. it's all bullshit. so you aren't free anytime this weekend?"

"i'm busy friday and saturday and i have work on monday so sunday night is a no go." i said, counting on my fingers. really, i just want to stay home with percy. it's been a long week and i was looking forward to a weekend with just him. i could imagine him now- in the kitchen shirtless, flipping bright blue pancakes. he's wearing an apron that says "kiss the cook!". i smile to myself.

"you get one boyfriend and it's like you're a different person," leo sighs defeatedly.

"this desk. this is the one." piper announces, pointing at a small wooden desk. i help piper find it and carry it to her car. after leo's gone, it's just the two of us in the car again. i haven't been alone with her in her car ever since the day we had lunch with annabeth and percy.

piper turns the radio down as we drive down the street. "you ever get tired of him? hanging out with him so much?"

"no. never. not yet, anyway."

"i'm happy for you, jason."

she stops outside of percy's apartment and we exchange goodbyes. i walk up the stairs and unlock the door. i put my keys on the kitchen counter where percy is sitting on a stool and squinting at a cooking magazine.

"what are you doing, percy?"

"i'm tryna read this recipe but i have dyslexia." he puts the magazine down. i smile at him.

sometimes nightly calls isn't enough. sometimes him laying his head on me isn't enough. sometimes a kiss isn't enough. sometimes sex isn't even enough.

god,

i will never get enough of him.

even when he's on top of me, our legs tangled together. even my hands tangled in his hair. even when he's kissing me as if he's trying to suck to soul out of my body. even when he's making my head spin with the words he's whispering in my ear. even when he's making my heart pound with his tongue, it's not enough.

even when every inch of our skin is touching and pushing against each other, i need to be closer to him. as if my body desperately wants to fuse with his. as if the souls are trying to reach each other and our bodies are in the way. that's i feel when my skin's on fire against his. that i'll never be close enough.

and now that i know what i want, i can't help but say it out loud.

"kiss me,"

"say it again,"

"harder,"

"talk to me,"

"call me,"

"rub my back,"

and my cheeks burn every time i tell him to do anything, but he always just grins. sometimes he perks up and grins like a golden retriever being summoned. sometimes he grins that grin i remembered from our first night that makes me melt. that's how i know he doesn't ever get enough of me, either.

any conversation with him can go from laughing hysterically to talking about my deepest insecurities in seconds. he can go from telling me a dumb dad joke to reciting poetry to me in mere moments. i don't know where he keeps all the genius in his brain. somewhere behind the "dumb" facade he puts on. but he talks to me so different. the words that come out of his mouth sound like stars that he plucked out of the sky to give to me.

it's so odd that we ended up together. up until now, it was hard to believe that anyone would love me the way he does. he just has endless amounts of love in him. i don't know where he keeps it all.

"jason grace, what is going in that noggin of yours?" percy asked, waking me from my thoughts. he had his hands propped up on the counter, supporting his chin. he tilted his head and stared at me with his ocean eyes, trying to read my face. "what're you thinking so hard about, blondie?"

i sighed and walked over to him. i moved his hair up to kiss his forehead. "you. always you."