serendipity | pjh x lgl

b o n u s c h a p t e r t h r e e

The first time I saw you was when Taehyun hyung let me watch dance practice. This was sometime during the beginning of the year. At one point, you all started performing the dance you've been working on. I was in front of you guys, as Taehyun hyung told me to observe the performance. I didn't see you at first, but I did when you were at the center. I'm so sorry, but you were horrible. You didn't know the dance well, your face looked so blank, and you looked extremely tired. Taehyun hyung asked me afterwards about the practice, I said that everything was perfect, except... you. I told him that you looked horrible, especially when you were at the center. I didn't know your name, so I just pointed at you. He decided to let you go home early that day, to let you rest.

A few days later, the dance team performed that same song. I remembered how you looked like clearly. I was watching you even before the performance, and was expecting you to mess up the entire thing. But, from the first beat of the song, everyone noticed you, even if you were at the back at first. Your facial expressions suited the song well, every single move of yours was sharp, and you seemed like the center even if you weren't.
Later on, I overheard you talking with someone, I think it was Seob hyung. I heard him calling you Jihoon. Jihoon... that one name that has been circling around my head ever since then.

The next day, I saw you in my classroom. I thought you just had a friend to talk to, until I didn't see you leave the room when the teacher went in. I was ecstatic when I found out that you were actually my classmate. I wanted to get to know you, but I didn't know how to approach you. You were always talking to someone in the class, you never even noticed me. You didn't know my mere existence. Well, sure, you'd see me at times, but you didn't remember me. You didn't know me.

I'd sometimes see you and Seob at the basketball court, practicing some sort of new dance or just chatting about anything during your free time. Just saying, you two were painfully loud. My teammates would always tell me to tell you off, but I didn't know how. I didn't know how to get mad at someone like you. But, one day, they were already pestering me nonstop and told me that if I didn't do it, then they'll do it. I didn't like the tone in their voices, and that's why I did it. I demanded you two to quiet the heck down. I regretted putting out my anger on you two, but now I don't. That was the time you finally knew about my existence. The time that changed it all, like a plot twist in a boring book I was reading.

Also, by the way, you look hot when you're angry.

But, anyway... ever since then, whenever you'd see me, you'd always glare at me like I killed your pet or something. I was okay with it at first, as long as you get to see me. But, after some time, I wanted to change how you looked at me. I wanted you to look at me as if all the wonders of the world was seen in my eyes. When I had those thoughts, that was when I realized that I was falling hard for you. I didn't know you well, but I knew enough to know that you were the kindest person living.

When Sungwoon hyung took you and Seob hyung in our squad, let's just say I was the happiest person alive. I really wanted to spend more time with you, and to improve our relationship. I was honestly okay with us being friends only. When you two were added to the group chat, I didn't talk much at first. I was afraid you'd judge me.

You were the reason that I was motivated to go to school, already. Just seeing your smile could brighten up my entire day conpletely.

I just wanted to be friends at first, that was completely okay with me. But, that changed when I went to Taipei. Not being with someone for a long time really does make you realize a lot of stuff. I wanted you to be mine, and mine only. I wanted to make you feel like the happiest guy on Earth. I wanted to protect you from everything bad. I wanted to feel the softness of your hugs and kisses. I wanted you, Park Jihoon. All of you.

I chatted Sungwoon hyung earlier to tell him that I was planning to confess. He didn't reply but sent a voicemail. I was so stupid for not removing my earphones, let's just say it that way. He supported me a hundred percent, Taehyun hyung as well.

That's why I'm writing this right now. To give it to you with all those chocolates and stuff that I've bought for you. So, now, to end this really long letter, let me tell you this one sentence. Just one sentence that I have been dying to tell you...

I love you, Park Jihoon.

Love,
Linnie

"I can't do this, hyung," I told Sungwoon hyung, letting the pen fall from my palm.

"You can. I'm sure he feels the same," he assured me.

"You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"Lai Guanlin. I am not leaving this house of yours until you tell me that you will confess to him tomorrow."

"I can't, okay?"

"You can."

"No." I shook my head. I crumpled the paper wherein I wrote my confession, and threw it at the trash can.

"Lin..."

"I can't," I told him, looking down. "Just go."

He didn't say anything and left my room quietly.

When I went back to school the next day, I've been dying to see you. You were the last one to come to school, as always.

"Thank you!" You exclaimed, while holding the big stash of chocolates I gave you. "I wanna hug you, but, these chocolates won't let me."

I wanna hug you too.... a little kiss may do as well...

"You're welcome."

You smiled at me so brightly, the sun and starts combined would be jealous. Oh wait, the sun's a star too... But, you get the message.

Oh, how I missed seeing that smile of yours, hyung.

clues are scattered throughout chapters 30-40 and other parts of the book

;)