LEMONADE|| Keith Powers

Chapter 65: Trippin

Ricky sat in his bathroom drinking his bottle of Hennessy. The drugs were kicking in and he felt himself hallucinating. Ronnie's death replayed over and over again in his head and it hurt him to the core. Ricky cried leaning over the bathroom sink finally let it all out. "Fuckkk" he screamed to the top of his lungs. "I let you down bro; I'm sorry" he cried.

"You didn't let me down" Ronnie spoke. Ricky looked up confused. He shook his head "No, I'm trippin; I'm trippin" he said

"Bro, I'm literally right here" Ronnie spoke. "No, you're not-

"Look bro, you can't beat yourself up. There was nothing you could do" Ronnie stood behind him.

"It was supposed to be me...not you Ronnie, you were a good man" Ricky said wiping his face. "What makes you think I'm some angel? Just because I wasn't deeply involved in the shit doesn't mean I wasn't involved. I did my dirt too, it's just a part of the game" he said

"You had potential; you had so much talent you could've did other shit anything but this" Ricky said

"You too bro, hell yeah... you were supposed to be dead and not me" he chuckled. "But you're not. You're here for a reason so hurry up and got out of this shit. So you can feel free again. So you can feel alive again" he said

"No, I don't deserve it. They stole that shit from you. They stole your life man, I'd do anything to get you back here" he cried.

"Ricky you're acting like a bitch right now. This isn't even you. Look, don't feel bad for me. My ass don't have to watch over my back anymore. I'm living stress free baby, plus working for our father's were draining as hell. Yeah, Cortez  and I didn't have it nearly as bad as you but Giovanni can be just as selfish sometimes you know. I think we all wanted a normal life.. so I'm good. I promise you, I'm good" Ronnie laughed. Ricky laughed "I'm glad you're good, you're so right about all this shit G" he shook his head feeling nauseous

"Bout time I'm right, y'all niggas never listened to me anyways. It's some fine women up here so I'm big chillin" he said

"When it's my time maybe you can hook me up" Ricky said

"Fuck no, you took my fucking wife. Josie that was supposed to be mine bro and now you already plotting to take my women. You really don't give a fuck" he said

"My bad bro" Ricky said

"At the end of the day I'm fine. You're my brother and I love your crazy ass. So get it together because I don't want you turning into Grant's ass" he said

"How do you expect me to deal with the pain? Ricky asked him. It went silent; Ricky turned around confused. He felt like Ronnie was talking to him but he wasn't for sure if he was trippin. He felt relieved for a few seconds then realizing it wasn't true.

"Figure it out nigga" Ronnie said. Ricky shook his head rinsing his face. He looked at his blood shot eyes. He looked at the bottle of Hennessy throwing it in the trash.

Weeks Later

I sat at the table staring at Morgan dreading to tell her the good news. She was coloring on her sketch pad. I already told Erica and her reaction was priceless. For filming I'd be in New York for 12 weeks. Morgan and Jace couldn't stay with me and that part was going to be the hardest. I'd be able to see them mainly on the weekdays or after filming. I was trying to figure somethings out. Erica still has her own life, and our father can't take of Morgan and Jace. I looked over at Nesta sweeping the floor. It was nice to see her she hasn't been around like that lately. I was going to miss this home; it was so damn comfortable. Moments later Ricky came in from smoking. Ever since he found out that I'm going to New York he's been distant. We haven't been intimate; ever since I told him how I felt. He hasn't tried to make a move which was surprising. He says a few words and that's it. "Hi" I half smiled. "Hey" he said walking in the refrigerator to grab a Gatorade. He closed the door. "I'm going to tell her" I whispered. "Okay" he said.