My Crush | ksj

31 - Goodbye

A/N: guys thank you so much for your continuous support ♥ I hope you enjoy this chapter and leave feedback! Please also check out my new story 'Play Pretend', it would mean the world to me ♥ have a wonderful day!

Since the start of the winter holidays, time seemed to pass incredibly fast whenever I didn't pay attention but slow down when I wanted to escape certain thoughts. Maybe that was the punishment for not being able to stand up for myself. My mind was filled with the same thought, over and over again: Just talk to Seokjin. But I was too much of a coward, scared of his rejection, scared of starting something new. I was really great at making up excuses, wasn't I? My head sank further into the pillow.

For fuck's sake, I needed to do SOMETHING. Slowly, I got up, only to stare at myself in the mirror. Tired eyes and my washed out hair colour, I'd been too lazy to re-dye my roots. What had happened to me fighting for my freedom, to standing up for my friends and myself? I bit my lip and opened the closet door to finally put some real clothes on.

"Eomma, I'm leaving", my words echoed through our apartment as I grabbed my keys.

My mother poked her head out of the kitchen door "To where?"

"Taehyung's house"

The bus was filled with people, everyone wrapped in their winter clothes and lost in their own thoughts. I tried looking through the windows but the glass was completely misted. So I just stared at the other passengers and wondered if they had similar problems until it was time to get up.

My fingers hurt at the sudden coldness as I took off my glove to ring the doorbell. Weird that I'd only been to this place two times, wasn't it?

"Hayoon? Why are you here?", Taehyung's hair was ruffled and it looked like he hadn't slept that much. I mustered him, unsure of what my answer to that even was. He furrowed his brows "Come on in, it's cold"

After I took off my coat and shoes, I finally found the courage to say something "I'm sorry for what happened at the party"

He frowned, uncomfortable because of the memories. Just like me.

"Why are we still playing this stupid game, Taehyung?", my voice cracked. We just stood there in his living room, waiting for the other to end the situation.

"What, you want to be together with Seokjin? I heard he was pretty keen on making out with other girls, though", he moved closer towards me, inspecting my hurt expression "did your prince disappoint you? Oh, he was supposed to save you, wasn't he? But I guess that just proves that you're stuck with me"

My hand left an ugly red mark on his cheek "Stop acting like that, Taehyung. It's pathetic, you have to force your own girlfriend to be with you and you're PROUD of it?"

He touched his face, surprised by my response. But I wasn't done.

"You could actually be happy; you know? You're gifted with intelligence and handsomeness but you choose to throw it all away and cling to me as if I was some kind of trophy", my voice grew louder "I'm what's holding you back, Taehyung, you don't get it. This relationship – if you can even call it that – is destroying both of us"

He pursed his lips "Hayoon, you should be really careful of how you act", his eyes glistened with anger. But I wouldn't get intimidated, not this time. All my frustration was finally freed and begging to be thrown right into his arrogant face.

"Or what? You'll share some underage pictures of me or that porn of Namjoon's slut girlfriend with YOUR dick in it? Do you even realize how ridiculous you sound?", I moved closer, staring right into his eyes.

Taehyung smiled. All he did was fucking smile. Was he for real? He took out his phone and unlocked it while murmuring "You finally hate me"

What kind of psychopathic shit was this? My stomach turned as I saw what folder he opened.

"Look, I'm deleting all of them", he turned the display in my direction as the pop up read "Deleting seven images and one video file..."

I was in shock but didn't want to show it so I just blurted out "Oh, as if you don't have backups"

Taehyung shrugged "Why should I? There was no chance of anyone getting a hold of my phone, was there?"

After all this time, he just did that? My eyes watered up against my will so I turned away.

"Hayoon, I know that it's not really your favourite thing, but please trust me. There are no more pictures or videos", his voice was almost too quiet to hear.

"Why?", I faced him.

"Because you finally gave up on me. You realized that it's not your job to fix me, just what I wanted all this time", Taehyung's smile was the most genuine I'd ever seen it on him. For a split second, I felt sorry. But it was right that we finally let each other go.

"Goodbye Taehyung", I left without looking back.