Ask The South Park GangClosed for Requests

Kyman is real?,Cat fight(get it?), Accessories,

Criss: MAD-FOR-TEA dares Cartman and Kyle to go on a date.

*Time Skip*

Criss: OK readers the guys and I are positioned in the restaurant under cover. We're watching Kyle and Cartman from a couple tables over.

Cartman: *at table* Why did I agree with this?

Kyle: *at table* Because it's a free meal and you're a fat ass?

Cartman: WAIT! Free meal, damn this might not be too bad.

Criss P.O.V

The waiter got to their table giving Kyle and Cartman their meals. Nothing good was happening. They just dug in with the occasional glare. When they were done eating there was an awkward transition where they waited for dessert.

Cartman: So Kahl I saw you didn't try to steal my food. You greedy Jew.

Kyle: Shut the fuck up Cartman I don't want to be here as much as you.

Cartman: Kahl you know why I bug you right?

Kyle: Because I'm a Jew and you're insecure about your weight?

Cartman: I'm NOT FAT I'M BIG BONED! Nevermind you stupid Jew I just won't tell you why.

Kyle: Wait, do I see some heart in you?

Cartman: *Wiping face with napkin* Don't tell anyone or I'll bury you in my back yard with Freddy.

Kyle: Who's Freddy?

Cartman: Exactly.

Kyle: Why are you being so.... Not Cartman? I thought you hated me?

Cartman: Typical Jew.

Kyle: Whatever.

The waiter came back to their table and all of us were a little uneasy at what just happened. I shifted in my seat as they dug into their plates like animals again. They finished quickly and again there was an awkward moment where they had to wait for the check.

Kyle: I'm stuffed.

Cartman: Hardly. This place sucked.

Kyle: Maybe this wasn't as bad as l thought it would be....

Cartman: Shut up Kahl.

Kyle: See there's the Cartman I know!

Cartman: Shut up Jew.

Kyle: Why do you think people think we like each other that's weird besides I like Rebecca you like Abbey. *chuckling awkwardly* Weirdos huh.

The date was over and we ran to our secluded room where the guys answered questions before Kyle and Cartman could get there. We didn't want them suspecting that we were spying on them.

Criss: Ghost_Wing asks Catwoman or Black Cat? Look up their pics before answering, Catwoman is DC and Black Cat is Marvel

Stan: I searched Black Cat but all I got were pics of black cats....

Kyle: So much for super.

Kenny: *looking up picture(putting DC next to black cat)* Black cat! Look at those fucking hooters man! She's not afraid to show 'em.

Kyle: Aw, dude. No. I guess I'll say Catwoman since she's not....

Cartman: A stupid hoe who sells out her hooters to get a burger?

Stan: I don't think that's what he meant but I think I'd go for Catwoman too.

Cartman: I'll go for the bitch with the huge knockers if I'm gonna like one I'm gonna choose the one with the biggest hooters

Criss: You guys don't even mention how the rising likeliness of Marvel surpasses the DC company especially with their new movie Gaurdians of the Galaxy?

Cartman: NERD! *gets hit on the head* EH! *looks up*

Matt: What did I tell you about talking smack about my little sister?

Karly: Hey not even I can help but taunt her. I mean.... Look at her!

Chris: I thought you guys said you'd try and be nice?

Stan: When did these... I mean when did you guys get here and why?

Karly: We got a question from a reader. Which is weird. Don't worry I'll play nice *whispering* Stanley.

Cartman: Great just what we need more hoes.

Chris: Cartman, you don't need to take your rage out on these hoes because you were raised by the biggest one.

Cartman: That's it! I'm kickng your beaner ass.

Criss: Woah! No don't hurt him, we're Mexican we won't hesitate to sue an all white family. OK moving on! From Tooma2468 to all guys including my siblings and I. What is the accessory that you always wear after showering or just are used to wearing.

Stan: Uh I don't know my undershirt? *lifting shirt* It used to be my hat but we don't wear them that much since high school policy doesn't allow it.

Cartman: Ha lame! I carry this. *shows peper spray* My mom says I need it whenever some bitch ass hippie comes near me.

Chris: I carry my earbuds it's the only thing that keeps me sane. It blocks out these dumb asses with all their arguing *pointing to siblings*

Karly: Oh shut your smug mouth Christopher. I carry my cellphone everywhere I'm always on the internet.

Matt: Nothing, if the computer was portable maybe. 

Criss: You have to get out of your League of Legends obssession.

Matt: I do bring a lighter though. *lights lighter in front of her eyes threatingly*

Cartman: I bet Jew boy here always carries around his bar of gold around his neck.

Kyle: DAMMIT CARTMAN I told you that was a stereotype!

Criss: You don't have to be afraid that someone will steal your gold Kyle.

Kyle: *facepalm* I always bring a pencil and paper to school does that count?

Karly: Lame.

Kenny: I always bring an extra pair of underwear.

Everyone: Why?

Kenny: Because sometimes I usually don't go places with underwear I like to go commando, and just in case I'll bring a pair. Or if the town is in danger I'll change into my Mysterion outfit which obviously requires underwear.

Criss: You are one odd boy McCormick.

Matt: Seems reasonable.

Karly: You boys are all gross *burps as loud as possible* 

Criss: *sarcastically* Yeah because you're so lady like

Chris: At least she didn't fart in your face like when we were kids.

Criss: I hate you Christopher.

Chris: Right back at you Christina.