Black Beauty (Z.A. Love Story// Explicit)

3// Pick Me Up at Six

Hello everyone. Finally going through all these chapters and changing things up a bit. Editing bad sentences and getting rid of unnecessary characters and details. It's awful. I was such a bad writer when I was fourteen. Still WOULD NOT recommend reading this chapter because I'm STILL WORKING ON IT, and the grammar, and overall structure would be messy, and there's paragraphs I haven't even finished, and I wouldn't recommend reading the next chapters until I'm done with them because they are just soooo bad. They should be done by Sep. 9. Thank you.

The day became lighter, and morning came as it always had.

I felt the desire to smoke, so I went to the bathroom, and opened the small, patterned window above the bathtub, and stuck my head outside into the breeze.

The leaves from the peach trees and tall olive trees fluttered like butterflies, and the smell of grass was strong. The feeling brought back memories.

I missed that feeling of being young and being fresh. I remember myself; I was only fourteen and hated to be alone, yet that was all I wanted, and I would only stay in my room reading Sylvia Plath (pretentious, I know), and one of the only things I longed for was to be loved, to be touched by a boy and to touch one, and love someone completely. I still craved that.

I continued to watch the hill I lived on, the white clouds rolling above, and smelling the dead olives and grass in the California air. The little golden dandelions bobbing and the white apartments on the hill brought me comfort. The beach would be beautiful now, but in the whole ten months I have lived here, I've never once been to the ocean yet.

   How did I get here? 

I was here, in California, like I always wanted, but the circumstances definitely weren't as I wanted them. I wasn't as happy as I imagined and I wasn't living with someone I loved, nor were things even right in my own head. 

   Eventually my cheeks got cold and pink, and I put my head back inside, where it was warm. I dropped the ashes in the sink, then placed the cigarette in the ash tray near the tub. This was what it felt like to be young and completely, one-hundred percent bored. 

$$$

I did my makeup not long after. Dark eye shadow, dark red lips. I parted my black hair in the middle, which I rarely ever did, and let it fall down in front of my shoulders.

I then changed out of my slip, and into something I could actually wear.

I found a black cropped t-shirt I must have bought from an American Apparel store a while ago, because I forgot about it and found it in the back of my drawer. The decision of whether or not I should wear a bra was a completely different story in all honesty. One part of me said Yes, you should wear a bra in case you go out in public. Nipples are still considered shocking, while another side said No, your boobs will be stinging once you take it off.

I decided I would.

I also decided to where a pair of cropped, faded jeans.

Once I was made up, I examined myself in the mirror in the bedroom. I looked the way I wanted, and there was nothing better than that. 

But what would have been better? If I actually had somewhere to go. 

After that is when I realized I had completely neglected my phone. How? It sat on my unmade bed like a diamond on display in a jewelry store, in the open.

Had Zach texted me back? That's what felt most valuable to me.

In my hands I pressed the button. It was dead. What if Zach had tried to text me, or even call me? What if he was waiting for a reply of some sort, but was now getting the notion that I wasn't interested? I scurried to the kitchen area where my purse with the charger was.