Women that say No

Chapter 26

"You know we love you Madi." My mom said entering my bedroom where I was finally attempting to get some sleep.

I could honestly say I hadn't slept in forever and a day. It was finally weighing on me.

"I love you too mom, thanks for everything." I mumbled, talking with my eyes shut.

I could feel her take a seat on my bed from it indenting in from the weight of her,

"If anything were to happen in which I know rick won't allow, I'm going to take good care of those babies."

I sighed to myself not wanting to have this conversation again.

I simply agreed, "Yes mom."

But she continued on, "is there anything you want to talk about, I'm here?"

I nodded no still with my eyes closed. "No mom not right now." I replied softly. "I just want to rest." And with that notion I slipped into a deep sleep. Deeper than any I had ever experienced, everything I had been going threw for not only the past weeks but years was weighing on me.

The time I had spent building this fake lifestyle trying to protect my babies, was exhausting me every day, day by day. This sleep was like no other I had experienced. I dreamt of happiness and pure peace, something I hadn't experienced since I was a young girl. Prior to losing my virginity everything had rolled down hill from this point on.

I had put so much trust in rick only for him to betray me.

How could I have been so stupid.

I was young and naive and had been taught major life lesson with everything from Kamron raping me until now.

I awoke about about 11pm, I had slept for 2 hours, everyone had eaten and slowly gathered around to discuss, what I soon realized was me.

"Rick I don't know what we would do without you. Madison is very lost and I just thank you so much for being such a guiding figure in her life." I could hear my father voicing from the staircase like a kid on Christmas Eve sneaking down while Santa was unloading, that's what I felt like.

"I'm just happy to be of assistance. I hope I can fight this battle this time. God knows I've watched her grow into an adult and I'd never want her to have to suffer from such a mistake as this."

"None of us do." I could hear my mother harmonize.

"I'm going to put the babies to bed." Angela announced shuffling around as I froze on the steps knowing it was too late to move.

"You're up." Angela softly said bumping into me as she turned.

"Yeah, I missed dinner huh." I said as normal as possible coming down the Two steps.

"I'd say... you better eat something I know you could use it definitely."

"Maybe a little later, Where's my babies?"

"I'm actually going to check on them all. I'm sure Allures playing with her sisters and brother, they're fine Madi." Angela said softer than I had ever heard her speak. No matter what Had happened I began to think about how she had cared for Power my entire trial and been a mother figure to him when I couldn't be.

For the first time in a long time I realized that she was a woman that I had played a part in hurting. That moment that she shared with me was her showing just how hurt she was, I couldn't imagine hurting her again by telling the truth.

In that moment I couldn't help but realize that our kids were one.

Just the roller coaster ride of emotions amongst us all had taken a toll on me.

"Come on woman, let's go check."  Angela giggled grabbing my arm and leading me up the stairs.

Following in her trail I began to wonder if I was just in another dream or twilight zone.

As we arrived the sound of Power and Rj talking rung off and the girls were giggling. With everything falling apart around me this was the one thing that held me together. A sense of family that I had been lacking for the last couple of years. My way of protecting my kids was really hurting them.

"Isn't it beautiful?" Angela asked absorbing the moment.

"Very. Angela I just, I just want you to know I'd never hurt you."

"I know. Everything happens for a reason, I dont even think you owe me an explanation. I don't even care as silly as that may sound. I want to put the children first and let them be happy, you know. Enough of our bickering, I guess seeing you in this predicament kind of woke me up of how selfish I was being. Enjoy these babies while their young is what I've learned and enjoy the time we all have here on earth. I don't want to put you threw more than you've already been threw. You've been strong madison, so strong. I remember you being just a teenager going to school, I can hate you, id rather  Love you, if not for anything but being a wonderful mom. I want our kids to know one another. Whenever you're ready Ofcourse."

"Gosh..." I sighed overwhelmed. "Angela I really have to still say I'm so sorry, but thank you for making this change for me and my kids and yours.. really our kids. It means a lot. But with everything going on, I think things are better as they are for right now, I don't want anymore turmoil in this family."

"Ofcourse I understand. Well I'm always here if you ever need to talk. I'm here, you're in great hands with Rick trust."

"Thanks. Angela does rick know you know or?"

"No, doesn't have a clue."

"Ok, I really wouldn't want and didn't want to ruin what you all had. I admire your marriage."

"Don't worry Madison. We don't even have to have the awkward conversation. Rick and I are fine and will remain. You know I thought about divorce like I said, but I don't want my children to be raised without a father."

Her words condemned me like a broadway light. Leaving me to absorbs that very statement.