Matt showed up a few hours later and my head still felt like it was going to blow up. He came in and sat down on the couch next to me. "How do you feel?" He asked, pressing his hand to my forehead.
"Like death," I joked, pulling my feet up on the coffee table. I wasted no time in getting to the subject he had come to discuss. I was certain that he was convinced I was a drunk. "So, what exactly did I say last night?"
He looked down at the coffee table and sighed. "You told me that you are in love with Jared and that you don't care for me. I thought it was just the alcohol talking at first, but then I really had time to think about it and maybe you really are still in love with Jared. I mean you were crying pretty hard about what the girl at the bar said to you last night. You then threatened to beat her ass Kristen. I think you may have, if you hadn't fallen down."
"Oh god, that's embarrassing," I said, covering my face with my hands.
"From the time we left the club you talked about him nonstop. You know, like how he kissed you the other night when you left the club with him. You talked about how perfect his lips are and you even said that you wanted to call him. I took your phone from you and carried you in the house. I put you in bed, where you got confused and thought I was him. You also tried to pull me into bed with you and I gotta tell you Kristen, I really like you, but I respect you too much to take advantage of you like that. I ended up taking your house key off of your key ring and locked the door when I left." He said glancing out the window. God, I was so embarrassed by my behavior.
"Oh man, Matt, I'm so sorry. I feel horrible about that. I shouldn't have gotten so drunk, but I think you're right, I do still have lingering feelings for Jared."
"I believe so. Kris, I think that you should take some time to decide what it is that you really want. I really like you a lot, but if you're still in love with Jared, I can't deal with that." He handed me the key back. "You're a sweet person and you deserve to be happy, you and Emily. If you choose to give him another shot, make sure he treats you the way you deserve."
"Thank you Matt. I don't know what's wrong with me or what I want to do." My plan wasn't to behave like an idiot last night, it was to just tell him how I really felt.
"It's alright, it hasn't been that long since you guys separated and I guess you're not ready to date just yet. You need to figure out what you want. I have a feeling that you guys aren't finished. That's just my opinion, but you have to decide what's best for Emily and you." He put his hand on mine. "I'm gonna go, but if you need me, just call." He hugged me before walking out the door.
I knew he was right, I had some serious thinking to do. I remembered that woman telling me about her and Jared being together and it made me angry all over again. I was hurt and confused. How long was he seeing her? She said, 'affair,' meaning it went on for a while. I changed my clothes and heard my phone ringing from the next room. Of course, I didn't make it to the phone in time. It was Jared. After taking a shower, I called him back.
He asked if he could keep Em another night and since I felt like complete shit, I agreed. I was sick the rest of the day and the thoughts of what I was told about his affair, replayed in my mind.
I spent the day on the couch feeling awful and not just from the drinking. I was feeling so guilty about what happened with Matt, but at least we parted on good terms. The next day Jared came to bring Emily home. I was in the kitchen packing some snacks for our little outing. I had been missing her lately and wanted to do something fun. After another sleepless night, I came up with the idea for a day at the zoo. Jared smiled as the two of them entered the kitchen. "Hey," He gave me a friendly greeting as he pulled her jacket off. Emily ran over and wrapped her arms around my leg. Reaching down, I picked her up and sat her down on the countertop next to the insulated bag I had packed.
"Hey. I'm taking her to the zoo." He raised his eyebrows at my statement."Well, that will be fun." He moved a little closer, kissing Em on her cheek. His hair was getting longer and he looked great. When he leaned against the countertop behind me, he spoke. "You and Matt have a good time?" He actually didn't sound sarcastic this time when he asked.
"It was good," I had no intention of letting him know what happened. I spun around and made eye contact for the first time in a while."Jared, would you like to go to the zoo with us?"
He looked totally shocked that I even asked, like it was some kind of trick question. "Sure, is Matt going to be joining us?"
"Nope, it will just be us three. Hey, can you take her and put her in the car seat, I'm driving? I'll grab the bag and lock the door." I was busy putting the snacks into a bag while put her down.
He slipped the pink jacket back on her and exited the house. When I slid into the car, he cleared his throat. "Thanks for inviting me."
I was still annoyed about what the redhead at the bar said and wanted to question him about how long it had been going on. This was the real reason I invited him, to find out the truth.