I didn't hear from Jared for a whole week and then he just showed up at the house. I was still pissed off at him for turning me down that night and all of a sudden he's fine with me dating Matt? Something wasn't right. He showed up, saying that he wanted Emily for the night. I was not happy and didn't plan to go anywhere. I was hoping to spend a quiet night at home and let Matt and Emily get to know each other. Matt didn't have any children, but was doing well with Emily until Jared showed up. Her attention immediately went to her father, of course.
Matt pulled me to the side, saying that we should take advantage of his generosity and go out. On my way to my bedroom, I threw Jared a dirty look. I quickly found the dress I knew was Jared's favorite and put it on. Thank God my hair looked good today, so I didn't have to do anything with it. When I walked out into the living room, I knew that he recognized the dress because he instantly looked away.
I kissed Emily goodbye while Matt and Jared shook hands. Jared picked up Emily and carried her out the door. "Okay, say goodbye to mommy and Matt. You guys have a good night."
I suddenly felt sick to my stomach and didn't know what I was doing anymore. We stayed outside, watching as Jared drove away and I felt Matt's arms tightening around my waist. Taking my hand, he pulled me into a hug.
We went out to a club and my plan was to intentionally get drunk. I thought that I could pretend to get sick and have him just bring me home. I felt so bad and knew that I was going to have to be honest and let Matt know at some point, that I still had feelings for Jared, but the only question was when. I didn't want to hurt his feelings.
Walking into the club, Matt recognized a few of his friends and I let go of his hand and walked a few feet away to the bar.
I sat there, downing quite a few shots and my thoughts very quickly became a little blurred. My plan to get drunk was going great when a short redhead approached and sat down right next to me, talking to some guy. She happened to recognize me as 'Jared's wife.' "Hey, I know you!," she said excitedly.
"You do?" I asked, but I certainly didn't recognize her.
"You're Jared's wife, or ex wife or whatever. Did you ever get back together with him?" She turned toward me, anxiously waiting for my response. She was thin, had red hair, and dressed in the tiniest dress I had ever seen. Her long, wavy, fiery red hair was flawless. There was something so familiar about her, but I just couldn't place her. She proceeded to tell me about her, 'affair' with my husband. That's when it hit me. This was the bitch that he was in the New York hotel room with. I felt like I couldn't breathe and all I wanted to do was leave and go home.
Matt heard part of the conversation and must have realized how disgusted I was. He looked at me and asked, "Ready to get out of here?"
Nodding my head, I vaguely remember threatening her and then the room started to spin. I didn't remember much of the ride home, but I woke up in my bed. Matt was gone and I was home all alone. Looking at the clock, I could see that it was almost noon.
Stumbling to the bathroom, I got into the shower. I felt so sick and couldn't stop dry heaving. I turned off the water, not even bothering with clothes, I threw on a robe. I heard my phone, but had no idea where it was to answer it. I finally found it, but I was too late the caller hung.
I first called Matt, who answered right away. "Oh man, I'm so sorry about last night." I apologized right away, hoping he wasn't too upset with me.
"It's fine Kristen. You were saying some things and I didn't know if it was the alcohol talking or your true feelings, but maybe we should talk about it."
"What exactly did I say?" I had no idea, but I was drunk so there was no telling.
"We can talk about it later, my band is here right now and we are in the middle of something. Can I come by later?"
"Yeah, that will be fine. I'm so sick anyway."
"I bet you are. I'll be by a little later. Get some rest. Bye." I knew that I was in no condition to talk to him right then. Hopefully as the day progressed, I'd feel better.
