all i want // max and harvey mills

T W E N T Y : T H R E E

[ harvey's pov ]

"hey. can i talk to you?" i said, standing by kathryn and ali's doorway. ali looked up from her phone and nodded.

"i've been meaning to talk to you about..the other night," ali said, relieved that i'd asked to talk first. i nodded. "yeah, that's what i wanted to talk about too. so...you first." i said with a short smile at the end. she laughed and moved closer to me, kind of freaking me out if we're being honest.

"okay. in all truth, i felt sparks harvey. and i was upset when kathryn turned up with whoever that other girl was because i wanted it to keep going.."ali said, placing her hand on mine.

i laughed and pulled away from her, thinking she would laugh along, but she didn't.

"oh..you're not joking?" i asked, praying she was. she scoffed and shook her head. "harvey i'm serious! i like you a lot!" she exclaimed, standing up and throwing her hands into the air.

i rolled my eyes. "i just wanted to make kathryn jealous. i knew max liked her, so i just wanted to get her to myself before he got to her." i explained, not noticing how stupid that actually sounded.

ali shook her head.

"harvey, although kathryn and i aren't on the best terms right now, i'm just going to give you some  advice that deals with her. kathryn isn't a girl that just bends to people's wills. she'll come up face to face with someone who doesn't like her and ask why they don't. she won't fight jealousy with jealousy, she'll forget about you and move on because she doesn't like people who are fake. and that's why she gave you a chance, because she saw something in you that i cant even see. and you just ruined it." she said, leaving the room in annoyance.

i sat on the bed, stunned for a second. i really did let all of the 'bad boy' qualities get to my head. i'm not even really a bad guy, i just wanted to seem tough, but this made me seem stupid.

while thinking, kathryn walked into her room and looked at me. "oh..hey harvey," she greeted, sitting down beside me.

i sighed. "hey kathryn..i need to talk to you." i said.

"yeah let's talk." she replied, getting up, taking my hand, and walking outside onto our porch and sitting down on it. there was a breeze outside, which cleared my head a bit, but i was still ashamed of myself.

"can i talk first?" she asked. i nodded and let her explain what she'd been trying to explain for a few days now.

she inhaled and exhaled then started. "when you were with your friends in the park practicing 'football' , ali was busy, so max and i decided to get some ice cream. when we got it, i wanted to try his lemon flavored sorbet, and when i did, i guess his bottled up feelings just took over harvey. and you can't blame him for it. i mean, i shut it down, but i also didn't blank him when you and i started dating. i mean yeah, i didn't like try to cheat with him, he just didn't understand and went for it. but i'm sorry." she said, making what i was going to tell her so much worse than max just pecking her on the lips.

i nodded.

"kathryn. i don't blame you. i mean, who wouldn't be in love with you? it's just that i thought max knew that i really liked you. i wasn't just trying to mess around with you like every other girl. and i knew max liked you. it was written on his face. and that's why i-i.." i cut myself off, scared to tell her who i'd cheated with.

"you what harvey?" she asked, holding my hand.

"i tried to make you jealous with ali.." i said, unable to look at her. i could sense the hurt in the air, the hurt on her face.

she let go of my hand.

"oh. ali..i see.." she said, getting up.

i grabbed her hand to keep her from leaving. "kathryn. i'm so sorry. i'm just so used to having girls like me even more when i try to make them jealous, but i should've known you were different. i mean..i knew you were different; i just didn't think before doing what i did. and i'm sorry for being such an idiot." i finished, trying to make this better.

she nodded. "i get it. it's fine. you're forgiven. but this 'us' thing's over." she said, smiling a little and walking out, leaving me alone, sitting in my own regret and guilt.

•••

author's note—please read & comment

hey guys :) so i'm thinking of releasing a new book for the boys' birthday tomorrow. should i? i literally have 6 books i'm ready to release haha. please comment if i should of not!!

also, i've been on vacation in the middle of the ocean, so i didn't have wifi or i would've updated sooner :) ly