The End Of All Things // B.U

The Time Someone Crashed

Sunday 16th December
I got up from where I was sat in my room to go find Brendon. "Hey have you sorted out tour yet?" I asked sitting next to him in his studio.

"Yeah. There's just one problem." He replied.

"What?"

"You need two opening bands. There are only two other bands on this label that are free to tour with you."

"Who are they?"

"SnS and Dead Roses."

"But they both hate me."

"You're gonna have your own bus with your band but they're the only two available. Seb might be able to go on tour with you but other than that you'll only have your band."

"Seb can come with me?"

"Yeah. It was gonna be a surprise but you looked terrified so I thought I'd tell you."

"I have three weeks right?"

"Yeah. It's kinda sad that your starts just after Christmas and that I might not see you for your birthday but this is what we have to deal with."

"Yeah I guess."

"Come on. Let's go to the meal."

At the restaurant
We went to the meal and I was sat in between Sebastian and Josh (Dun) with Harley and Oli sat opposite me. They kept shooting me death glares so I stood up halfway through and went outside to smoke. As I smoked the tears flowed down my cheeks but as soon as I wiped it more came.

A few minutes later Sebastian came out and wrapped his arms around my waist. "What's wrong? You only smoke when you're upset, annoyed or angry." He mentioned.

"They keep staring at me from across the table. It's scaring me." I replied turning around and burying my face in his chest. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"Let's go back in." He pulled away and wiped the tears before pecking my lips and dragging me back in. I sat down and they kept staring at me so I decided to say something. "Can you stop staring at me? If you have something to say just say it because you're scaring the shit out of me and I don't know what to do. I know you hate me but you don't need to remind me. Just eat your food and pretend you still like me even a little. You know what I think I'll just walk home." I put my jacket on and seb grabbed my hand.

"I'll come with you." I nodded and we left.

Next day
"Hey Ava. You okay?" Brendon asked knocking on my door. I nodded as he walked over and sat in the other chair by my desk. "What you working on?"

"A song. I think I'm gonna release it after the album. It's very emotional. Here take a listen." I replied taking my glasses off and handing him my headphones. "Talk me through your thoughts." I pressed play and watched his face. He smiled then frowned and repeated it a few times. I laughed and he took the headphones off.

"It's good. I like that bit. Ooh that falsetto. Could've gone a bit lower there. That ending!"

"Final thoughts?"

"That's about Harley." My face dropped and I turned back to the computer. "Ava we all know you're still in love with him."

"I'm not. He's a jerk. I love Sebastian. He's nice to me and caring and hot and has a good personality. He also didn't abandon me when I needed him the most. He's way better than Harley."

"The only reason Harley abandoned you was because you gave him a reason to."

"Leaving the band isn't a good enough reason. If I was in his position I wouldn't be anything like he's being. He's just staring at me and making me feel uncomfortable and hated. He even managed to get Kayla and Jack to hate me. He's horrible. The worst part is I don't even hate him."

"Hey hey hey. Sh princess. It's okay." He hugged me and I didn't even realise I was crying till he pulled away and there was a tear stain on his shirt. "Look. If you were meant to hate him then you would. But you're not. I don't know if you'll ever go back to the way it was before but I doubt you'll hate each other for-" His phone started ringing so he picked it up. "Hello? Oh hey Mr Miller. He did what?! We'll be right over." He hung up and looked so worried.

"What happened?"

"Harley went out with his friends today. He was in a car crash." I clasped my hands over my mouth and froze in shock. "He wasn't the one driving but he has probably the worst injuries out of all of them. He's knocked out but he's quite bad. We're gonna go visit him. Come on." I got up from my desk and we went to the hospital.

Hospital
We got let into the room and I saw unconscious body. His bruised face and broken leg made me anxious. I couldn't go in with him hating me so I sat outside while Brendon spoke with his dad. I lifted my knees up to my chest and got lost in thought. The tears started flowing but I wasn't sobbing. I was just sitting there contemplating life.

Someone came up in front of me so I looked up. Jack was stood there with his arms open so I stood up and ran into them. "Sh. It's okay. He's gonna be fine. I promise." He cooed. I stayed silent, scared of what my voice would sound like. "He's still breathing just not awake. He'll wake up soon."

That's when all the beeping happened and Brendon and James got pushed out of the room. "Dad? What happened?" I asked turning to him.

"We don't know. We were just talking and it just happened." He replied.

"What were you walking about?" James and Brendon both looked at each other as if they had a realisation.

"You."

"W-What?"

"Yeah. Maybe he could hear us?"

"So this is all my fault?"

"No but yes." James added. "Ever since you denied him he has been extra distant. That's when he started going out late and started smoking again an-"

"What do you mean by smoking again? He never told me he smoked." I asked.

"He smoked since he was nine. Then when he met you he gave it up."

"Oh. So it was my fault. Everything was my fault. I'm gonna go home. Brendon you can stay I'm gonna get Zack to pick me up. I need to clear my head."

I walked outside the hospital and got straight into Zack's car to take me home.

Home
I walked inside the house and straight upstairs, into my room. I looked at myself in the mirror and didn't like who I saw. So I did what every normal person would do. I wrote a song about it.

Don't be that way
Fall apart twice a day
I just wish you could feel what you say
Show, never tell
But I know you too well
Kind of mood that you wish you could sell

If teardrops could be bottled
There'd be swimming pools filled by models
Told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore"
If "I love you" was a promise
Would you break it, if you're honest
Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before
I don't wanna be you anymore

Hands getting cold
Losing feeling is getting old
Was I made from a broken mold?
Hurt, I can't shake
We've made every mistake
Only you know the way that I break

If teardrops could be bottled
There'd be swimming pools filled by models
Told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore"
If "I love you" was a promise
Would you break it, if you're honest
Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before
I don't wanna be you
I don't wanna be you
I don't wanna be you...
Anymore

I sang the last line and my eyes flooded with tears. I decided that it was late so I went to bed.