Killed by Cancer

Chapter 64

'The hardest part of life is saying goodbye to someone you wish to spend a lifetime with' - Unknown.

***

I wiped my tears and forced myself to keep a straight face. My hands were shaking. I looked up behind me at the coffin with Tyler's picture on top. I smiled at first and then the sadness hit me immediately after. Forcing myself not to break down in front of everyone, I walked back to my seat and sat down. Kylie gave my shoulder a squeeze; she was sat behind me.

"Landon, his best friend, would like to say a few words,"

I turned around to Landon and gave him a reassuring smile. He stood up and walked to the front and pulled a piece of paper out.

"Tyler was my best friend. I knew him since we were kids. He was 5 when he moved to my school and honestly he was the most popular boy then. Everyone wanted to play with him except me really. At break and lunch, I was always on my own, not giving a damn. I had myself and I never needed anyone else, at least I thought I didn't. But he came and he sat next to me. I remember he asked 'can I play rockets with you?' and that's the day where I knew he was someone special and he must've saw something in me otherwise he would've asked any of the other 30 children dying to play with him,".

"I never sat alone ever since. One day, he came into school and this is probably when he was 10 and he just broke down in tears. I had never seen Tyler cry but I knew something must've happened, something serious and that was the day that Tyler's dad passed away. It changed him. After that day, he was different, he was more stronger in a sense. He never came into school with lunch or any money after then so I shared my lunch with him and I always tried to  make sure he never went hungry. Of course, he might have but I didn't have a clue to what was happening at home. All I knew was that his mum never bothered to give him a packed lunch or money to buy any. Whenever I asked him, he'd just change the subject."

"He always went the extra mile to make people happy. He spent a really long time organising a treasure hunt for Alexa. I'm going to miss him. I'm going to miss his horrendous jokes, his unbelievable
laughter, his annoying voice, his messy hair, him stealing my food, his poor taste in music and every single thing about him that made Tyler Tyler. He didn't deserve this, he didn't deserve any of this,"

"People always made assumptions that he was just a 'bad boy' but he wasn't. Yes, he was late to school everyday but that was because he had to drop Ariana off to school before he came to school. He missed lessons, so he could take a break and have time to himself because at home, he was doing everything. He fell asleep in lesson because after he tucked his sister in bed, he'd go to work and work the night so that he had some money in his pocket. Honestly, I'm so proud of Tyler for raising his little sister as if she was his own child."

A tear slipped from Landon's eye.

"It's hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember. There will never be a day where I won't think about you. You'll always be my best mate, the boy I shared my dinner with so he never went hungry, love you Tyler,"

He folded up the piece of paper and put it in his pocket. Landon came towards the seating area and I made space for him to sit down next to me. He sat down and I held his hand. Ariana stood up shakily as it was her turn to say a few word.

"You know you don't have to do this," Mum whispered to her.

"I want to," she said.

She walked to the front and stood on the stool so that her face was visible over the pulpit.

"I'm Ariana, Tyler's sister. Tyler was everything to me. He always looked after me. He always cooked me food because Mum never did that. I knew Mum didn't like me or want me but as long as I had Tyler, I wouldn't need anyone else. I have to say he was a terrible cook at first but he got better. He used to watch Jamie Oliver and that chef that swears a lot on TV so that he could be a better cook. And he did get a lot better. I loved his pasta the best. Tyler is my world and I would do anything to bring him back. I just want..," she said before pausing.

She erupted in tears.

"I want him to come back. I miss him so much. I just want him to come back," she sobbed.

She dropped to her knees as her body shook as her sobs filled the room. Ryan rushed to her and picked her up and carried her out through the nearest exit, the doors on the left.

The funeral continued with words from his old mates. Dean gave a speech which was meaningful as well as heartbreaking. After, we all went outside to watch as the coffin was put into the ground. When the coffin was down, I bent down to the ground and delicately dropped down the rose that we grew together onto the coffin. I then watched as soil was put onto the coffin and it was there and then that I broke into tears.

Tyler wasn't here to hold me. I quickly walked away from the scene, not wanting people to look at me. Landon came rushing after me. He showed me his hand.

"You want to escape?" He asked.

I nodded and took his hand and we walked off into the distance.

__________________________________

I hope you all had an amazing Christmas. I also hope that this new year is more blessed than the last. Last year was awful for me - and I'm sure it was horrible to plenty of other people - but we need to think positive. It's a new year and a new start. Any new year resolutions that you have?

My new year resolutions:-
- lose ten pounds (should be easy)
- finish writing this book
- start writing my new book that I've already planned
- aim to see my therapist weekly
- trying to think of the positive side of things
- not pushing my friends away
- eating healthier
- drinking more water
- improving my grades that are currently Bs to As
- talking to you all more
- updating more often
- being a stronger person

(I sometimes have panic attacks and it's happening too often recently so hopefully all these factors mean that they lessen)