Old Yellow Pages ✓

18. lighthouse

9th december, sunday, 2018

dear diary,

an analogy:

I feel like I am floating in an ocean with no oar and no shore in sight. I feel a sense of purposelessness, monotony and dullness.

I came up with the Lighthouse Analogy in an attempt to figure out why some people seem to know everything and why it seems as if they have everything going for them and life is easy for them. They always seem to know what is the right thing to do, and whatever they do brings them success.

It is a dark, stormy night and a ship is drifting among the waves. The compasses are not working. The captain doesn't know what to do; he can't see the shore. So, the passengers of the ship crowd around him and give some suggestions, telling him which direction to take. He takes a left, a right, running in circles, never reaching any place.

But what if there is a lighthouse ahead? He will know which way to go; their opinions won't matter.

I think the ship is your life, and the passengers are the people who come into it or go out of your life. The lighthouse is your goal, something that keeps you grounded and gives you direction. If you can't see the light house, your ship will be navigated by the conflicting opinions of the people in your life.

If you can see it, then you will drive your own ship, and no matter what people will tell you, you will keep going that way because you can see where you are going, you know what you are doing.

If these people want to come along, they will. Otherwise, they will deboard your ship. But it's alright, I guess, because on the island you will find congenial company. You will meet people like yourself.

And anyway, you won't notice them leaving. Your eyes will be on the lighthouse, after all.

I used to never care about what people said about me. I miss being that chirpy, happy girl. I hate the darkness and negativity taking over me.

But I can't see my lighthouse anymore. 

And I'm wondering if what I saw was indeed a lighthouse or just a mirage.

❄