We're broken people~ Adopted by Tyler Joseph

19~ nightmare

(T/w of attempted suicide )
The way back to the busses is mostly silent. Tyler gives me space but continues to play music. I still don't know what's gotten over me. And why they are back.

We make it back to the busses and I immediately run to my bunk to take a power nap since we don't have to be at the arena until 3:30. I checked the time making sure to set my alarm for 12. In an instant I fall asleep.
~~~~
I wake up shortly later and see I'm in the woods again and on a tower thing.

The same woods I tried killing myself at.

I look down and see I'm back to that winter night

"Please don't take you're life away from us crystal, we need you me and Jenna do."

He doesn't care

The words of there voice, neos voice almost sound calming, like they are right, and that I've been wrong this whole time.

Without hesitation I respond cutting him off. "You don't care I know that!! You just wanted someone who could pretend to be you're daughter. Don't think I'm stupid Tyler, I know much better then that."

"Crystal I'm not lying"

"Save your words Tyler," I start "I'm done with everything."

"Crystal NO!"

Do it. Now

I cannot win can I?

"Goodbye". I let go from the railing and feel the wind in my face. As I'm falling the word terrified keeps flashing in my head.

I'm guess I am just terrified after all.

~~~~~
"NO!" I yell waking up from my nightmare. Tyler comes over along with everyone else.

"Crystal are you okay?!"

I shake it off to show I'm okay, but I'm actually not "yeah sorry for disturbing you guys, I was just having a nightmare, that's all." Vivid images start appearing in my head of the dream, and of that night in the forest.

Everyone left but Tyler.
I know he wants to make sure I'm okay. He knows I'm defiantly not okay.

"Positive?"

I smile, "yep it's all good!"

He gives me a confused look before walking away. I shut my bunk curtain and start to cry.

This mess just began today. Neos back because of Abigail and now I'm having suicide dreams. This isn't what I wanted my tour life to be like.

I stare at the wall for a solid hour before getting up and deciding not to waste my time. I get ready, hair and all and see I have a good hour before we have to go.

Well I haven't done this is a while.  I get back up in my bunk and shut the curtain. 

I pull out a small notebook from under my pillow and take an observation of it.

The front is very plan. Just had some twenty one pilots quotes on it. I open it up to the most recent entry.

It was from almost a year ago the day I got taken from my abusive family.

It reads, "well I'm never going to write in this again because I won't be alive to write anything else but oh well.
It's April 13th...I think? I don't know. I'm crystal (no shit why am I telling myself my name it's not like anyone else will see this) so today's been shitty all I want to do is sleep but I can't because I'm in a freaking cop car because someone found out that my parents like taking their anger out on me which is very sad. Anyways I want to go bye"

I take a pencil that I kept in the notebook and begin to write

Hey, remember me? Yeah I'm here still alive. Well this will be very short but I need to get stuff off my chest, I cant tell Tyler because I have no clue what he will do but I'm hoping no one finds this. But I'll explain. I have a voice in the back of my head I've given a name to. They are named neo. It's almost like how Tyler has Blurryface. Anyways things been better neo hasn't been bothering me because tours distracting me a lot, but things got bad today. I saw shit head Abigail and she triggered something inside me for them to come out. I took a nap and for the first time in a while I had an awful dream of the forest situation. But instead of me not giving in, I did. I'm hoping nothing else happens. ~Crystal.

I shut the book and put it back under my pillow.

"Crystal lets go!" Jenna shouts

"Coming!!" I grab my uke and head out for the last show of this tour.

It's going to be a good one.