Love Song (LGBTQ+) (COMPLETED)

34. Deeper

Throwing myself up, I caught Jay by his shirt and ripped him backwards. The suddenness of my tug and where he stood caused him to fall over the other side of the couch - landing on his back, right on top legs. Jay didn't move or make a sound for that seemingly eternal moment, until he began to laugh out of nowhere. It was like he found it genuinely funny, even if it wasn't all that funny. To begin with, it was just a small bit of payback for saying I looked good on my back, nothing more or less.

Even so, that genuine smile and laughter that I ever so rarely saw from him made it obvious why girls waited in line for him. The reason Jay had his choosing of girls were those eyes and that smile. His hair and the way he dressed were always spot on, too. There was only one answer, he was just one of those guys. Jay had mastered the complexities and shamanistic intricacies of the female libido, it was that simple.

The fact of the matter was simple. I was blindly in love with Grace, and I knew she was my future within any route I took in my life, but Jay was just enough to make me question that idea. It hadn't been just those looks for me, it was something else I couldn't quite pinpoint. What made me question that idea was something that lied beneath those looks and behind those eyes, but the words I was trying to search for just weren't coming.

"I called Ana." Jay lied on my legs with no apparent intention of moving.

I was shocked, to be honest, but it was pretty much like had Jay said. I was glued to Grace, in every way. If she woke up and I was with someone else, I would have left them for her. No questions asked. Obviously, I wouldn't have ever said that out loud. It made me look and sound like a horrible person, but it was truly how I felt. It didn't matter if that person was Jay Ward or some regular John or Jane Doe, Grace was an insurmountable wall for them. She was an insurmountable wall for me, too, but I was on the other side of it alone with her. That was what I wanted to believe, at least.

"H-How did that go?" I asked, actually kind of curious.

"She hung up on me the first time." he muttered, directing both his head and eyes at me. "I called again, and she told me that I have thirty seconds to say what I needed to say. So, I'm sending a plane ticket. . .Well, my manager is."

I held back a laugh. It was idiotic, yet somehow completely ingenious. He couldn't have said everything he needed or wanted in that time, so he used the only resources he could while he was in here. His manager and his money. I mean, maybe I was a few cards short of a full deck, but who would actually think like that in that amount of time? Most would just bumble and hope the other side was forgiving enough to listen to more. Jay knew she wouldn't be and thought on his feet.

"You think she's going to come?" I eyed his painted-on jeans, still unsure of why a guy wore clothes that tight.

"Probably." Jay smirked. "What girl says no to me, the great Jay ward?"

"Her, by the sound of it." I tried to pull the jeans away from his skin with little luck. "She knew Jay Ward before he became Jay Ward. She knows your best and worst, your lightest and darkest. She knows what she loves and hates about you, and if what she loves outweighs what she hates. All those other girls can't say the same."

"Well, duh. I mean, you make it sound like your girl and you have a lot of history behind you." Jay looked at the roof. "Isn't it the same for you two?"

It was hard to say. Whenever Grace had been around, it wasn't a stretch to say that I changed in places. I always smiled, even when I had rarely felt like actually doing it. I put on more makeup and probably overdid my hair, when I felt like being lazy and just letting her see me as myself. I dressed a little more provocatively, when I would have to chosen to throw on something bigger and looser-fitting. In some ways, I physically changed myself for her. I exercised a lot for her, when I would have much rather been spending time with her and being lazy for a little while.