Love Song (LGBTQ+) (COMPLETED)

24. Speaker (Interlude 4)

"How are you, Lynn?" he closed the door and made his way around the desk. "I'm Mr. Long, your counselor."

Taking a deep breath, I turned back to the door that blocked my only exit, the door that separated me from the rest of the world. It was just me and someone who claimed to be a counselor, all alone. It was just me and some stranger that I'd never met before. Before I turned back, I took another large breath and tried my best to smile, to put on a mask and attempt to feel things I would likely never feel again.

Wearing a customary smile, he used his chair to roll over to a set of large cube-shaped drawers and pulled one open. There, he ripped out a manila folder and made a slow roll back as he opened it, appearing to scan it for relevant information. I mean, it hadn't taken a genius to figure out what he was studying. Setting it down, he looked up with the same smile he had been wearing the whole few minutes I'd been there and pointed at the chair.

"I'm fine, I think?" I continued to wear the fake smile as I pulled out the chair, calmly sitting. "Am I in trouble for something?"

"Well, I think everyone's heard about you and Devin Herrera at this point. Even us. And normally, we try to stay out of these matters unless they get violent." he brought his fingers together. "But. . ."

My head cocked as I leaned forward. "But, what?"

I watched his fingers crawl to the edge of the folder and shut it before my eyes traveled back up, meeting his once more. His eyes had spoken for him, deep in thought as he tried to carefully formulate the words that would follow. Within those moments of his thought, that smile he donned had faded and was now replaced with the expression of seriousness. A seriousness that I wanted to run from, a seriousness that I hadn't wanted to hear or be a part of.

"We may have reason to believe that your relationship with Devin wasn't consensual." his open palm grazed against my skin softly before setting his palm on top of my hand. "Is this true?"

Even as the look of sympathy passed over his face, I sat entirely still within my own utter shock. I never told a soul what happened, and the only person who knew was Nathan. Had he told someone, even after he said he wouldn't? The only things I could in hear that deathly silence was the sound of my heart as it continued to pound and the distant echoes of a single, lone word. Nothing else was there and nothing else wanted to be there.

Trying my best to collect myself, I took yet another breath and sighed it out as a smile returned to my face with a raised brow. My rationality wanted the truth to be stated, to be told like it should have been in the first place, but I wanted something entirely different. I wanted the truth to be buried six feet under, where it belonged. It was to protect everything I still had in reach, to protect everything I still understood.

"It was consensual." I almost looked away as my hidden left hand began to turn into fist. "I mean, Devin's seriously hot. What girl would be dumb enough to say no?"

"Lynn, I know it must be horrible. But if something did happen to you, then you need to speak up now." he leaned forward.

Looking to my right and up at the wall, I found an abstract painting. It was just splatters of black and red paint, as simple as could be, yet it pulled in me in. It sucked me in like a vacuum, so I could be anywhere but that room, anywhere but my own mind. "Look, I had sex with him. I was willing and so was he. That's it."

This was the moment I needed to carry the strength that Grace always showed to me. The strength to smile through the lies and the pain, the strength to help others and forget about herself. This was the moment I needed her to lend me that strength, wherever she was. I needed her to bring it to me, I needed her to show it to me. This was the moment I needed her to show up and hand it to me.