I Won't Say It (T'Challa Udaku)

Chapter 3

While I had a room at the compound I still need my space sometimes, so I kept my apartment on the upper east side in the city. I stopped and grabbed me some food, then headed to my apartment, during the entire trip my phone kept ringing it was my uncle. I just put it on silent, I needed time to think. I walked into my apartment and sat my bags on the counter. I heard a noise I looked up to see my ex coming from down the hall

"Where have you been?" He asked

"What are you doing in my house?"

"I came to get the rest of my stuff but I wanted to talk."

"Talk about what? We're done get your stuff and go."

"Isha-"

"How's your daughter?" I asked changing the subject, we've been together for a year and a half and he has a three week old daughter that I just found out about right before I left to Lagos

"Ayesha baby just listen please."

"I'm not your baby what's there to listen to? I know what's up."

"It was one night I was out and I had a few drinks."

"And it took you nine months to tell me?"

"I messed up I know but can we work this out?"

"No go work on your family, now get out I've had a long day."

"Ayesha I'm sorry." He said and I rolled my eyes, my patience was starting to wear thin. His phone started to ring he looked at it then silenced it and looked at me with a guilty look on his face.

"If that's your baby mama answer it."

"I'm not with her."

"It could be an emergency she might not know how to change a diaper."

"Don't be like that Ayesha."

"Be like what? Hurt? Angry? What should I be like Dave?" 

"Calm down, and let's talk. You never want to talk to me that's part of the problem." I just crossed my arms and stared at him.

"You can't be this stupid. The entire problem is that you had a baby with someone else!"

"You were always working."

"I'm not going to be a housewife I explained that to you when we met, if you couldn't handle that you could've just left."

"I never said you had to be a housewife, I just want you to take some interest in this relationship."

"There is no more relationship, so please finish getting your stuff and leave." I turned away from him but he grabbed my arm pulling me back

"If you know what's good for you, you better let me go." I said staring him down

"Stop walking away, I want this to work."

"You should've thought about that before you had a baby with someone else, and you want to blame that on my work? Just get out of my house." I said I could see the anger burning in his eyes. He yelled and punched the wall. He didn't scare me in the least bit

"Are you done?" I said he took my key and threw it at me then walked back into my room, coming back out with his bag ten minutes later

"You know what your problem is? No what one of your problems is?" He said pointing his finger in my face

"What?"

"You are a cold heartless bitch, and your going to be alone forever. You talking about how I lied, you've been keeping secrets since day one. I tried to be cool but you would never open up. I wanted to love you but you won't let me."

"You have a really funny way of showing love."

"It's impossible to love you."

"You're not telling me anything I don't already know about myself......Now get out before I throw you out." He just shook his head as he left slamming the door behind him

I walked into the kitchen and poured me a shot of tequila, I downed it then poured me another needing to be numb. After my third shot I felt the tears fall but I quickly wiped them away.

No weakness I thought to myself as I felt the alcohol take effect. I let the walls down for tonight but come tomorrow they go back up and I'm not letting anyone break them again