Dancing with death (klance) Blind au

Unforgettable Scars

*W A R N I N G: self hate, self harm, negativity. If these are triggering do not read!

Keith's POV

It honestly was a little weird having so many people around me again, don't get me wrong, I'm happy to have Katie and Matt back in my life and of course their friends.

But it just, it isn't the same anymore.
I want to see the people I'm around, I want to recognize them when I see them somewhere. But I don't think I can ever have that.

When Adam, Matt and Pidge left, I excused myself to my room, Shiro's friend Allura came over, and I didn't want to be in their way.

I know Shiro says I'm not a bother, useless nor anything in those categories. But I can't get the demons that have made their home inside my mind out of me.

You're useless.
           I know.

Waste of space.
          I know.

No one likes, cares, nor even wants you.
          I... K-know.

Slowly, I made my way out of my room, I stopped in the hall and listened if Allura and Shiro were still downstairs. I didn't hear anything, except my own breathing.

'They probably left'. I thought, as I continued walking towards the bathroom.

It's true when people say old habits die hard.

It was difficult being blind 8-16 year-old who was jumping from foster home to foster home. No one wanted me.

I know I'm covered in scars, but because I can't see them, I don't know where they are, the only scars i do know are, are the ones under my eyes and on my arms, stomach and thighs.

Sure, I know I'm dancing on a thin string, but dancing isn't the only thing that can give me the relief that I need, though I never go too far.

I entered the bathroom and soon enough I had the razor blade in my hand.

1 cut
    
           3 cut
            
                        6 cut

I heard the front door open and close, it surprised me and I accidentally cut too deep, I tried to hold in a scream.

'it h-hurts. It n-never hurted t-this m-much'. I thought to myself.

I could hear the footsteps coming up the stairs and closer the door of the bathroom, some muffeld noices were yelling something, but I couldn't hear them. I felt dizzy and my leg were giving out, I felt myself falling. I hit the cold, unforgiving floor.

Right before I blacked out, I heard the bathroom door open harshly and someone came to my side.
______________________________________

You are the couse of the pain that people around you feel. You are the reason why people leave you behind.
      I already know that....

If you already know that, then why are you still here, living, walking over these grounds?
      Why? I-I don't k-know....
        J-just leave m-me al-alone!

Like the other people left you?
Believe me, you hate being alone, left behind and I am the only one who has stayed by your side all these years.
       ... You're a monster.

Wrong. I am you, your scars your pain, all of you. You are me and I am you.    Y o u   a r e   y o u r   o w n   m o n s t e r.

-----------------------------------------------------------

My God.
Poor Keefy, he has some gruel demons.

But I have to do this to Keith, this story has to go like this.

Word count: 581