Just Before The Dawn [DaeJae]

Twenty

It was about one at night, Youngjae was still awake, while Daehyun and Junhong had been sound asleep for two hours. There was a light snoring to be heard, last night Youngjae had identified Daehyun as the source of this sound. He didn't mind though, since it wasn't loud and not annoying, instead it even sounded kind of cute. 

Youngjae was still thinking about Jumin's words from earlier. He couldn't get it out of his mind, he had nothing to distract himself like he usually did, there had been no chance to get alcohol. He already felt the effects, his hands were shaking and he felt cold, shivery. In addition to that, his thoughts wouldn't leave him alone and soon he found himself sobbing into the pillow. 

It was pointless, Who was he trying to fool anyways? His situation would never change, Daehyun and Junhong might be nice to him but that was all, there would never be something like a friendship between him and them, after all he still was the weirdo, the faggot nobody wanted to be with. He was just a bother, nothing else. Who would want him as a friend? 

Noticing one of the others moving, he immediately tried to stop crying. He didn't want them to notice, but he couldn't help it, it felt impossible to calm down without his usual methods, so he got up and quickly  went to the bathroom where he sat down on the floor, hoping whoever had just woken up would not come here, since the bathroom had no key, but hoping did not help. 

Two minutes later, Daehyun came in. "Youngjae, what's wrong?" he asked when he saw the boy and sat down next to him. "You can tell me, I'll listen and try to help." 

The younger shook his head and lied his forehead down on his knees. Suddenly he felt Daehyun's hand on his back, stroking him softly. 

"It's okay. I'm here, you're not alone." He kept comforting the boy, until the latter had calmed down a bit. 

His breath was still a bit shaky, but he raised his head and wiped the tears off of his cheeks. 

"Is it about what Jumin said today?" the blonde asked, still not pulling back his hand from the boy. Youngjae nodded, making the older sigh. "Damn, this idiot..." he now wrapped both arms around Youngjae, carefully pulling him closer. "Don't listen to that asshole. People like him don't deserve your attention." 

"But he's right" Youngjae whispered. 

"Why do you think that? What did he say?" 

"Nobody likes me, I'm just a bother to everyone... He's right about that..." 

Daehyun felt a lump in his throat, seeing the boy like that. "Do you really think that?" he asked quietly, trying not to start crying himself. 

Youngjae nodded. "You know what status I have at school, it's not any different in my private life..." he mumbled, crying harder again. 

"I know it is hard for you, but-" he trailed off when Youngjae shook his head. 

"You know nothing.... Your life is perfect, you have everything, you don't know me..." 

"Youngjae, I've seen enough to know what's going on in your class. But that's not how everyone thinks about you. Junhong and I , we don't have any problem with you, you're not a bother to us at all." 

Youngjae just shook his head. Daehyun either did not understand or he was lying, because right in this moment, he was being a bother. He kept Daehyun from sleeping, he was annoying him with his whining. He didn't even know why he told Daehyun about all this right now, but he just felt too weak to deal with everything by himself. 

"Youngjae, believe me. I know it is hard, but you can trust me, I'll be there for you. You can always talk to me when you need to." He took a deep breath, still trying to hold back the tears, and hugged the boy a bit tighter. 

They sat there like this for a while, Youngjae eventually relaxing in the older's embrace. He did not know if he could really trust Daehyun, it felt too good to be true to have someone who was there for him, but for now he did not have a choice. He did not want to annoy Daehyun anymore, so he closed his eyes, just letting himself go in the warm hug. 

"Have you thought about changing to our class? Maybe that would help you..." 

"Mr Kim wouldn't let me" Youngjae said. 

"It's not his decision, and I'm sure Ms Park would help with it, since she knows what's going on." 

"She just helped me yesterday because it's her job" he mumbled. 

"Did Jumin say that?" 

Youngjae nodded. 

"Don't listen to him, he would say everything just to make you feel bad. Ms Park is the greatest teacher I've ever known, she really cares about her students, I'm sure she will help." 

Youngjae just nodded lightly, then he yawned. 

"We should get some sleep, don't you think?" 

The younger nodded. "I'm tired." 

They got up, leaving the bathroom, Youngjae lying in his bed first, while Daehyun gave him another smile. "Good night, Youngjae. Have sweet dreams." 

"You too." 

The blonde then went to his own bed, grumbling as he noticed Junhong had moved, now lying in the middle of their bed, leaving almost no space. 

Daehyun squeezed himself onto the bit of the mattress that was free and closed his eyes, thinking that this was worth it, since he had hopefully made Youngjae feel better.