Just Before The Dawn [DaeJae]

Nine

This night, Youngjae couldn't sleep, like so often. Again and again he took his phone from the nightstand and opened facebook, where he stared at Daehyun's profile, his thumb hovering above the 'Send Message' button, before he locked the phone again and put it back. 

He was getting on his own nerves so badly. 

It was around 4 in the morning when he finally decided he had to do something. 

Again, he opened the older's profile, but instead sending a message right away, he started scrolling through the timeline. 

He had no idea why he suddenly thought so much about Daehyun, he had never really liked him but today had made him think. 

The way the older had been talking to him was so different from what Youngjae would have expected from a guy like him. A guy who had everything - money, perfect grades, friends, the possibility to choose his girlfriend out of all girls at school... Thinking about it... Youngjae wondered, if Daehyun had also seen his story. Probably not. He for sure would not have talked to him if he knew Youngjae was gay. But... It was basically impossible that he hadn't heard about it. 

Sighing, the boy eventually put his phone away. It was pointless. It made absolutely no sense that someone like Daehyun talked to someone like him without any purpose. It probably was a trick to find out more about him to laugh about, but Youngjae would not let that happen. 

He got up and quietly went to the kitchen. Now at this time it should be safe to leave the room without meeting any of his dorm mates. He lived in a general dorm, sharing the hallway with a few other guys from different schools an universities. 

He had never met any of them. 

Not like they hadn't tried talking to him when he moved in here, but he had not opened the door. He couldn't need more people talking about how strange he was. 

After pouring water into the boiler and switching it on, he took a bowl from his cupboard and a bag of ramen and prepared everything, then leaned against the kitchen counter and closed his eyes for a moment. 

This was the first night in a pretty long time he wasn't drunk. 

Not because he chose not to drink, though. 

But he had emptied his last bottle the night before an due to the plan he had made on the bridge and the following conversation with Daehyun, he had not thought of buying something new. 

This night would be hard. Not that it wasn't already, though. He clenched his hands into fists so they would stop shaking. It wasn't enough to notice on first sight, but he felt it way more than it was visible. 

He hated the feeling. 

He knew he shouldn't drink so much, he knew he was on the best way to a really bad addiction, but he couldn't stop. There was too much in his daily life he needed to forget somehow. 

The water boiler turned off and the boy poured the hot water over is noodles, then carefully took the hot bowl and went back to his room.