Chapter 21 ( Christmas edition ) part 1.
The town was in mass destruction after the anaconda ass incident.
Dan watched out the window as the town clean up.
"Fuck me" Dan sighed
Phil suddenly came out of his room and pulled out his dick
"OkaY"
Dan screeched
"JEsuS PHIL NOT LITerAllY"
Phil continued to watch Dan.
"Dan what are you doing" Phil asked
"You see Phil, it's almost Christmas" Dan replied
The snow outside fell on the window, melting instantly.
"Well yeah I get that but why are you so depth in thought"
Dan sighed and sat down by the fire place
"I'm not good at pleasing people with presents nor am I in the Christmas spirit"
Phil sat down by Dan.
"You see Dan,
The thing is
I don't really give a fuck" Phil said flipping Dan off and running outside.
"LOVE YOU TOO" Dan yelled
Later that day, Dan went roaming around for Christmas presents.
He stumbled upon a store that caught his eye.
It was filled holy water drenched sex toys.
Dan bought 5 things from there before realizing at home they were sex toys.
"Fuck Christmas" Dan said
Suddenly Phil came about
"YOU DONT LIKE CHRISTMAS"!? Phil said in shock
"It's too hard. Plus Santa isn't real and Christmas is too fake" Dan sassed.
Phil raged with fear.
"LISTEN HERE THIS BABY IN MY STOMACH LOVES CHRISTMAS AND SO DO I SO GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER LIL ASS NIGGA BEFORE I KILL YOU" Phil screamed.
That night in bed, Dan thought.
"How is Christmas even fun? Everyone over obsesses over it. Santa is a lie. And no one even cares about Christmas spirt. I don't believe in Christians, nor will I ever will"
Dan tried falling asleep, but a strange noise was coming from his window.
"Dammit Phil what are you doin-" Dan was cut off by the sight.
He ran to his window.
"HOE HOE HOE LITTLE CHILD!!!" A strange man with a long white beard said.
"S-s-s" Dan could make out any words
"No Dan I'm not satan" the red dressed over aged man said
"SANTA" Dan yelled.
Santa smiled with a nod of the head.
"Yes it's me, Santa!"
"I thought you were-"
"Yea, everyone thinks I'm fake but no I am present" Santa said, laughing at his own joke.
"What are you doing here?" Dan asked.
"Well little girl, I heard you didn't believe in Christmas." Santa said, pulling Dan up to the roof with him.
YOU ARE READING
The Adventures of Dan and his boobs ( the boob fic )
FanfictionDan find out he has boobs and uses them in the best way possible YES this IS the original Boob Fic. anyways. Dedicated to the most ironic person I've ever known ____________ Daniel Howell
