Finding a Way | Adopted by Gerard Way

Five Months

Alcohol. They had alcohol in that cooler in the corner of the room. I've never even had a sip, but I know what it does to people. I've seen it with my own eyes, and nothing good has ever happened.

I was shaking in my beanbag chair, and Krash told me it'd warm me up. Raven told him to leave me alone. So, he did, for which I am grateful because I have trouble saying no to people. I was never allowed to say no. One rule I always had to abide by, without fail, was, "Do what you're told without question." Ever since I can remember, that was the rule.

When my mother needed me to hide away in my room and play and not come out for hours because she was "busy". When Mr. Johnson, my first foster parent, needed me to go get him another beer, or make him food. When the social workers came to check in at Mr. Brown's house (my second foster parent) and he told me to smile and nod and tell them I was "so happy to be living with him, he was so generous, he'd never done any harm to me," I did what I was told.

Gerard has never said it before. Needless to say, he's never had to say it before.

They had a lot of snacks in that cooler, too, which I politely declined. Things like Oreos, Cheetos, and gummy bears, among others. Things that, for the most part, I can't remember the last time I ate them.

"More for us." Zero shrugged.

"Why are you keeping that stuff in a cooler?" I asked, gesturing at the packets of snacks. "They... how should I say this? Don't need to be cooled."

He shrugged again. "You see a better place to keep 'em?"

I didn't.

He, Krash, and even Raven each lit a cigarette. No one bothered to offer me one, not that I'd take it this time, either. They knew better. You could take one look at me and bet the most rebellious thing I'd ever done was not read the terms and conditions before accepting.

I gave up on trying not to breathe in the smoke, though. I didn't have a choice if I wanted to stay in this tiny room with the three strangers, and for some reason I did. They were interesting. They weren't like any other people I'd ever hung around with before, and certainly not like the kids I knew at my school.

"So," Zero started at some point, "Technically speaking, can't a fetus be considered a parasite?"

Raven and Krash both rolled their eyes. They were obviously used to Zero asking such random, irrelevant questions out of the blue like that.

"No, really!" He went on, "Cause it, like, sucks up nutrients from its host!"

"I see where you're coming from, but I'm not so sure that's how it works," I said.

"Sure it is, Way." He grinned. "I paid attention in biology class."

"Bullshit!" Krash exclaimed. "You fell asleep in almost every one of those classes."

"Not almost every one," Raven said. "Every. Single. One."

It didn't take long for me to come to the conclusion that Zero was the funny one, going through that, "I'm so random!" phase, as teenage boys do. He was probably once considered the Class Clown. Krash, on the other hand, was more honest and serious (but not too serious). Raven seemed to be the one that kept them both in line.

They talked and laughed together in a way that made it obvious they'd been friends for a long time, but somehow I didn't feel out of place. I actually joined in on the rest of the conversations and enjoyed myself. I forgot about Emerald, about the Millers, and even about Gerard. Only for a little while.

I even ignored my phone, buzzing frequently in my pocket.

But maybe I shouldn't have.

Now, I enter the house as quietly as possible. I made sure I'd arrive at the same time I usually would after school, after assuring the gang that I'd come back to The Box tomorrow. That's what they call the hangout spot, The Box.