Tell Me That It's All Okay / Post Malone

Chapter 20

2 months had gone by since I texted Austin.

That's right. 2 whole months. And they were full of anxiety and restlessness.

He never responded to me.

I dreaded the thought of having to text him again and again but I knew I had to. I had no choice.

I was near 5 months pregnant now and I would be lying if I said things had been easy.

Michelle had been there for me whenever I needed her. My parents eventually got over the fact that Austin was a big celebrity that had no idea I was pregnant and they fully supported me with everything.

But I still felt so alone.

I left the doctors office after my checkup and got into my car. I pulled out my phone, opened my message thread with Austin and began to type.

Me: Hey Austin its Amelia. I really have to talk to you its important. Let me know if you can meet in person.

I sighed as I pressed sent. This was the 6th message I tried to send him and still nothing.

Every day that went by, I became more and more nervous to tell him. I wanted nothing more than to get it over with.

I constantly checked my phone to see if he had replied to me, but he never did. I knew I had broken his heart, and we hadn't spoken in so long, but I didn't think he would just ignore my messages like this. I made it clear that I really needed to talk to him.

Did I hurt him that bad? To the point of him completely ignoring me?

What did you expect Amy? That he was going to be so eager to talk to you?

I held the sonogram in my hand. I looked at the image of the baby forming inside of me and smiled as I ran my finger over it. I couldn't believe that I was going to be a mom to this tiny human.

I had been desperately putting off finding out the sex of the baby, because a part of me hoped I would have heard from Austin by now and we would find out together.

But after months of not hearing back from him, I couldn't take it any more. I couldn't wait any longer and the doctor finally told me the gender.

We were going to have a little girl.

I let out a sigh as I turned on the car and drove to my apartment complex.

As soon as I got home, I quickly changed into a t shirt and pajama shorts and crawled slowly into my bed. I pulled the covers over me, laid on my side and placed my hand on my stomach.

I tried to remind myself that I was strong enough to get through this pregnancy, even if I had to do it alone.

But of course my mind wandered, what was I going to do after the baby was born?

I thought of what my future would be like once my daughter was here and I couldn't help but feel sadness taking over me. I wanted to give her the best life possible but I knew it wasn't going to be easy if I had to do it without her father.

I wanted more than anything for Austin to have a relationship with this baby. But how could that happen if he didn't even know she existed?

I knew I couldn't wait and put it off any longer. The anxiety was killing me. I pulled out my phone and clicked on his name in my contact list.

I took a deep breath in and slowly let it out. My heart pounded as my shaking finger hovered over the screen.

I pressed call and brought the phone to my ear.