Results of a Restless Mind

I am not depressed

No I'm not depressed
Well,
I'm not depressed by a clinical standard
Not even by a Wikipedia definition
But is that any reason not to care?
Am I to be tossed aside with these razors in my throat
Cutting deeper each time I am forced to smile,
Just so you can help the girl over there with a certificate, a diagnosis that means you have to care.
No, I'm not depressed.
I know I'm not.
But this is an anthem for those who are not depressed.
But can't help wishing they were diagnosed with something to explain all the pointless feelings
The endless tearing of emotional ceilings that keep crashing down on us, and God only knows why.
This is for the ones who can't explain when their friends ask what is wrong
When a simple conversation makes you cry like you haven't cried since you were five years old.
When you feel weak in your own shoes, because if anyone could even walk even a step in them, it would feel like a mile.
This is for the ones who try to lessen their pain, or justify the way they feel with some bullshit explanation.
I'm just overreacting.
Don't worry about me.
It's jut hormones.
Yeah, maybe it is.
But it is an endless road that we are travelling alone.
And sometimes alone is the best way to go but. maybe if we could realise that there are others who struggle, we would feel more at home with our feelings that try to claim us for their own. But our struggle is not a competition, it is a cause for unity.
This isn't to dismiss the struggles that the diagnosed go through
The pain of having a name but, still having to suffer through.
We are all in this together
Professional diagnosis or no
Depression or just loneliness
Confusion or fear of being alone.
Heart break, grief and stomach pains,
Anxiety, though it is in no means the same thing, it is what we struggle with each day.
Everyone's pain is their own demon to face
And it's true, though heart breaking, some of us can't finish the race.
But when you are clinging to the only thing that gives you hope sometimes
At least you are trying
While many are dying
You are taking the littles things and, with them, you are defying all odds.
It's hard.
I do not know your struggle.
Everyone has their own pain
And though it's cliche
And simple, hurtful
You can't have a rainbow without a little rain
And maybe that ray of sunshine that helps you through is a person
A lover
An object
A pet
Maybe it's burns your throat on the way to helping you forget
Maybe it's slicing those lines through you wrist
As you try to take back your own destiny
Prove why you exist.
But hold onto that thing
Painful as it may be
Take each day as it comes
Look around, count three things you can see.
Diagnosed or not
We are all spare parts of a whole broken jigsaw puzzle
But by telling ourselves one more day, at least
We are making it through this puzzling struggle.