Bitter Sweet (COMPLETED)

Dalampu

"Uhm... paano mo naman nasabi na ikaw iyon?" Nahihiya kong tanong kay Charles.

"I just felt it." He said then shrugged.

Nagkatinginan ang mag-asawa sa harap namin. "By the way Charles you still haven't introduce this beautiful lady with you." Ngiti ng mama niya.

"She's Sweet Fuentes.... my girlfriend." Walang gana niyang sinabi kaya kahit naiinis ay pinigilan ko ito at ngumiti na lamang.

"Finally you've already moved on anak. It's been what? Two years? After Sheena ngayon ka nalang ulit namin nakita na may kasamang babae bukod sa mga pinsan mo." Ilang beses akong huminga ng malalim at pinipigilan ang nararamdaman ko ngayong emosiyon. What about the fixed marriage? Am I fooled again?

With gritted teeth I maintained my fake smile. I don't know how the dinner ended... all I know now is that I want to go home. I felt betrayed. I am very disappointed. And I'm hurt. When truth slaps you big time. It's fucking... it's bullshit.

"Wait Sweet..." Pigil niya sa akin dahil nagmamadali akong maglakad papunta sa sasakyan ko. "Please Sweet. Let's talk." Dagdag pa niya.

Huminga ako ng malalim at hinarap siya nang nakangiti. "Did you lie to me?" Nang hindi siya makasagot ay tinanong ko muli ito. "Yes or no. Did you... lie to me? Just answer please." I asked habang pinipigilan ang luhang nagbabadyang tumulo mula sa mga mata ko.

"Let me explain first Sweet. It's not what you think it is... please Sweet listen first." Aniya habang pilit inaabot ang mga kamay ko.

"Then what? Feed me with your lies again?" Tumalikod ako at naramdaman ko ang pagtulo ng luha ko. "Ang galing mo ding maggawa ng kwento... fixed marriage? Bakit nga ba hindi ko napansin... magaling ka nga palang umarte." With my bare hands I wiped my own tears. "I just can't believe... that I fell for that lie."

Hindi ko naramdaman na nasa likod ko na pala siya. I just felt his hands hugging me. "I'm sorry Sweet. Sorry. I took the opportunity and grabbed the chance when I heard about your fixed marriage..." Dahan dahan niya akong iniharap sa kaniya at natigilan siya nang makita akong umiiyak. He held my face and wiped my tears using his thumb. "Please look at me... I'm really sorry. I needed to lie. That's my only choice. I became desperate that lying became a part of the option."

Kahit umiiyak ay pinilit kong tumingin sa mga mata niya. "There's always an option to do things right...." I started while removing his hands in my face. "Anything that started wrong won't give you a good ending. You can make things right but you chose not to. It's been what Charles? It's been six months... you can tell it to me any day in that six months... but you still... kept it and continue to feed me with those lies... you wait until I fell deeper before you drop the bomb... what hurts the most is... I fell for it. Because after all this years I started to feel again... to trust again. But then... maybe it's not for me.... maybe I am still not ready for this... let's end this lie Charles. Maybe we're better of... alone."

Iyak lang ako ng iyak hanggang sa makarating ako dito sa unit ko. Ang sakit. Sobrang sakit. Dumiretso ako sa kwarto ko, kinuha ang mga gamit at sinimulang magpinta. Pati ba naman sa pagpipinta siya pa rin ang naiisip ko. This is insane. Sa sobrang inis ay binato ko ang kapit kong paint brush. Ginulo lahat ng gamit at tila baliw na nagwala sa sarili niyang kwarto. My room is a messed. Nagkalat lahat ng gamit at mga pintura. I am messy like how messed my life is.

I felt numb...

I don't want to move. All I know now is that I am deeply hurt. After all these years I still failed in love. A sucker for love but always end miserably. Maybe I will end up alone. Will grow old and die alone. No matter how hard I try it always end like this. Me in a dark room crying and hurting... and alone.

I woke up feeling empty. The thing about this is you'll still wake up and felt nothing. I cleaned my room then clean my self after. I went to the living room and reached for the landline then started to call someone. I don't know where my phone is and I don't care about it anymore.

"Hello... ate." Garalgal man ang boses ay patuloy akong nagsalita. "I have a favor to make and please keep this between us only. I'll meet you at the coffee shop near your office then I'll discuss about this. And another thing... go there na. I lost my phone. Paalis na ko ng unit. Thanks." Sabi ko at saka dali daling umalis.

It's really a good decision to have my unit na parehong malapit sa bahay at sa kahit saan. After twenty minutes ay nakarating na ako sa coffee shop na sinabi ko kay ate Spice at naabutan ko siya na nakaupo na at tila naiinip na naghihintay. She's drinking a non caffeine drink dahil nga buntis siya. Halata na rin ang pagiging buntis dahil sa tiyan nito.

"Sorry to keep you waiting ate." Humalik ako sa pisngi nito bago umupo.

"I want you to continue the construction of my art gallery." Panimula ko.

"But why?" Kalmado niyang tanong.

"There's a misunderstanding between me and the contractor. Hindi kami magkasundo sa gusto ko kaya plano kong ilipat ito sa ibang gagawa." Mahinahon kong paliwanag.

"Pero 'di ba si Charles ang kausap mo doon? What happened?" Kuryoso niyang tanong.

"How did you know that?" Kumunot ang noo ko.

"We knew about it since the beginning. Hinayaan ka lang namin nila Salt and kept you covered. Don't worry walang idea sina dad regarding that art gallery. Balita ko matatapos na iyon bakit hindi mo na lang antayin matapos? Nagkaproblema ba kayo ni Charles?"

Ngumiti ako at umiling. "Wala ate. Gusto ko lang na ikaw gumawa ng finishing touches." I lied.

"I just talk to Charles if you want. Wala namang kaso 'yun sa'kin. I'll just update you with that. Hindi mo na siya kailangang makausap. Ako na bahala. Just call me again when you're ready to talk about your problem. Just go home. Full force ang Fuentes siblings para sayo."  She hugged me before we both left the coffee shop.