Together Again ✦ Snily

[chap.12]

Chapter Twelve: Best Friends Don't Usually Kiss
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||Lily||

Severus was kissing me.

I don't know exactly what is wrong with me, because I didn't pull away nor did I kiss him back.

His touch and his kiss was creating this small spark within me, a spark of need. And I can't help but feel aware of how soft and tender his lips were, and how benevolently he was massaging my mouth.

But gently, I put a hand on his chest and push him back. His lips detach from mine, and what makes my insides clench because he does it so..... unwillingly.

I reckon that James was right. The James in my dream was correct, at least that's what I believe now.

His eyes widen at me, and his face is so red of embarrassment. I know I'm red too, I am blushing uncontrollably.

Best friends don't usually kiss, on the lips. With tongue action.

If it was possible, Severus went paler. He scooted away from me, but since there was no more room on the bed he stood up. He looked so shameful, as he looked to his feet. I am still too shocked to say anything.

"I'm so sorry." He choked out. "I am so so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking."

He should be bloody sorry. I'm not ready for anything yet. It's only been two weeks since James died. I felt guilty and exposed. I won't be a jerk about it though, because I wasn't mad. I was just, surprised.

"It's okay." I gulped nervously. He was still avoiding eye contact. I can't bring myself to say anything else.

"I should.. I should just go. To the meeting. I'll be back in a bit to take you to St Mungo's." He murmured unstably, then reached for the doorknob. That's when I noticed how much he was shaking.

He left. I don't know what to say, or what to think.

It's not like it was bad or anything. I just don't fancy him that way.

Or do I?

I mean, I've always found something interesting about him. His dark eyes, his mysterious ways, his rich voice, his pale skin, his rare smile, his broad shoulders, his mischievous smirk, his marvel at teasing, his soft skin, his loquaciousness that was usually reserved for me, his low chuckle, his admiration of potions, his adoration of books, his kind attitude, his moody attitude, his concerned frown...

Merlin. Apparently I find many things interesting about him.

Maybe. Just maybe.

||Severus||

Bloody hell.

That did not happen.

Please don't tell me that I actually got so carried away that I kissed her.

I was storming down the Hogwarts' hallways, with my black cloak wavering behind me. Every student that was near was glancing at me, but I did not have time to shoot them intimidating glares. They can screw off as well. I would give them detention, but I don't have time for that either. Lily is my only priority. Except, I may have just accidentally made her want to leave our friendship again.

How hard is it to contain one's self? I've done it many times before, what was so different about now? Oh. I know. Lily was just so close to me, the smell of her vanilla-jasmine scent was wafting up my nose. It smelt good. She looked good. So I did something bold and stupid and I kissed her.