Solangelo 1

Part 1

NICO

I walk into the infirmary with Will, prepared to talk a little, maybe, watch him work. Help out a bit. But his tone changes as soon as we step into the building.
'Okay, you take this bed. By the window. It's one of the better ones - and you're going to be here a while.' He says, sorting things out. He takes ambrosia out of draws and pours a shot of nectar.
'I have to stay the night?' I ask, hesitant. I don't like sleeping around other people. The last week or so I've been too tired to notice, but now I've never been more aware.
'There are curtains.' He says, pulling them out in demonstration, 'if they're pulled shut no one will come in.'
I stay silent, sit on the edge of the bed. My feet dangle just above the ground.
'I'm going to have to run some tests. A lot of tests. You are...radiating illness.' He says.
'That's just my natural charm.' I say to myself. But he laughs.
'Alright, this might hurt a bit.' He holds a needle between his fingers and goes to lift up my arm, but his hand drifts right through, 'what the...'
'Oh. Sorry.' I say, feeling my cheeks burning red, 'I wasn't concentrating.'
'You need to concentrate to take form?' He asks, his voice changing to one of slight fear. No, not fear - worry.
'I mean...yeah. Recently. The shadow travelling and all.' I say. I look to my hand. I don't want to meet his gaze.
'Okay.' He says. I can tell he's trying to be calm, 'so we don't shadow travel for a while. And we don't do any underworld...stuff.'
'Deal.' I say, 'it's lost it's appeal anyway.' The last bit comes unintentionally. I wonder if he suspects the fear I've learnt of my own abilities.
'Can you concentrate for me?' He asks, 'I need to get a blood sample.'
'Yeah. Sure.' I say. I watch as he takes my hand in his, traces his finger down my wrist to look for a vein.
'There we go.' He says to himself. He takes the needle and slowly pushes it in. I don't expect to feel much; after everything I've been through, a needle should be nothing.
'Oh Gods.' I say, reaching out unintentionally and clutching onto Will's shoulder.
'Sorry. Can't help it. What were you expecting?' He says, not paying much attention to our conversation, focusing on drawing my blood out.
'I don't know.' I say.
'What, you never had an injection before?' He asks, not really meaning it.
'No.' I say.
'Wait, what?' He looks up at me, focusing in on our conversation, 'you've never had an injection? None of the...really? Not even the ones you get when you're a kid?'
'Injections weren't really a thing when I was born.' I say, slightly embarrassed. I didn't expect such a big reaction.
'Oh. Of course.' He says. He takes the needle out carefully and passes me a Cotten bud to stop the bleeding, 'Okay well we'll have to sort that out.'
'What?' I ask, surprised.
'Yeah, we'll have to catch you up on everything you missed.' He says. I can see him already making a mental list of everything that needs to be done.
'You mean...more injections?' I say, unable to keep the apprehension out of my voice. He smiles.
'Don't worry, injections don't hurt as much as blood tests. Besides, I'll spread them out. No more than two a day.' He says.
'Two a day?!' I watch as he takes a chip of ambrosia and passes it to me.
'Eat.' He says, and I do without question, 'and yes. Two a day. You got a problem with that?'
I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out. He smiles at my speechlessness.
'Okay, now drink this.' He says, passing me a cup of dark blue juice.
'What is it?' I ask, swirling it around.
'It'll help you sleep.' He says. My eyes widen and I can't keep the fear out of my eyes. I see Will's face drop.
'I don't...I'm fine. I'm not tired.' I say. I haven't slept since before the battle. And I haven't had a good nights sleep since before Tartarus. For the last few weeks I slept purely out of necessity. I don't want to face that if I don't have to.
'Nico, you need to sleep. I can ask one of the Hypnos kids to stop dreams coming your way-' He says. But I shake my head and try to push the drink back into his hands.
'It's not dreams. I don't...' I trail off. He looks at me, waiting for me to finish my sentence. I hesitate. Will has been overbearingly kind to me the last few days. He hasn't treated me with fear as many other people did, or glorified me as others have. He has been one of the only moments of normality in my messed up life. He waits patiently for me to finish.
'It's memories.' I say, 'I barely have dreams anymore. It's just...reliving things.'
'From Tartarus?' He asks, incredibly calm. I don't meet his eyes, but I can feel his gaze searing into me.
'Yes.' I say, quietly.
'You want to talk about it?' He ask. He says it so casually that I can't help but look up at him. A couple of people have asked me about it. Curious and intrusive. But Will seems genuinely sincere; he will listen if I want.
'No.' I answer, on reflex. The idea of talking about it, of actually acknowledging it, makes me shudder, 'I can't.' I say, aware that my response sounded vicious, 'it's too...I can't.'
'I get it.' He says, 'I mean obviously I don't get it. But I understand not wanting to talk about it. But the bottom line is, you need sleep. And I know you know that.'
'I can't.' I say, a pleading tone coming through.
'What can I do? He asks, crossing his arms, 'what will it take for you to sleep?'
'I need to know that...that it'll be empty. That there'll be no memories or...just nothing.' I say. I look up at him and shrug slightly.
He stays silent, thinking and then leaves. I don't know what to think. Maybe he's just given up on me. But then he returns with two pink pills.
'Shock medicine. We use it for people who've just experienced a traumatic event. It basically wipes your head for a while. We normally only use it when we need to operate on someone and they're being difficult, or when they're a danger to themselves. But you need sleep.' He says, handing me the tablets and the glass.
'I won't remember anything?' I ask, wary.
'I can't promise it'll be empty, but it'll be better.' He says, 'I promise. But I can't go giving them to you every night. We're going to have to figure something else out. But for now.'
'Okay.' I say, looking at the pills for a moment before taking them and downing them with the drink. I instantly feel lightheaded.
I fall forward and Will catches me before I fall head first onto the floor.
'Alright. There you go.' He says keeping me upright with one of my arms around his shoulder as he pulls back the sheets of my bed, 'in you get.'
He sits me on my bed and gets me to lie down and I do so without argument. He pulls the blanket over me and I begin to find it hard to fight against the pull of sleep.
'Sleep, Okay? I promise you'll be okay.' I nod and bury my head in the pillow, unable to pay attention to the nagging insecurity of sleeping in front of Will. And other people.
I fall asleep in a matter of seconds.