The Break Up Plan (FINISHED)

Plan #33: Jean

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“Should I confront him about this?” I said over the phone as I throw myself into my soft cottony bed.

I hear her snort on the other line. “Bes, wala kang mapapala kung hindi mo siya tatanungin. Kung gusto mo man ng kasagutan sa mga katanungan mo eh hindi kausapin mo siya. Simple as that.”

I stopped what I was doing and I fixed my eyes on something that I’m not really sure of what it was because my attention was on the phone. Then I shift my gaze looking at the ceiling as if recollecting the thoughts at the back of my head.

Huminga ako ng malalim. “Pero paano kung…” I paused when a sudden thought came into my mind. Questions starts to resurface and stormed inside me.

“Ano?” Umalingaw-ngaw ang boses ni Angel sa kabilang linya na nagpukaw sa akin at nagpabalik ng aking gunita pabalik sa realidad.

“Ano?” sabi niya ulit.

“K-k-kasi,” I stutter at first before I finally say my words straightly.

“Natatakot ako kung ano ang mga maari niyang sabihin kapag tinanung ko siya. Paano kung?”

Napahinto ako ng biglang mabilis na sumabat si Angel sa kabilang linya.

“ 'Yan ka na naman sa mga ifs and buts mo eh. Alam mo walang mangyayari kung papangunahan mo ang sarili mo ng takot. How would you know if you’ll never ask? Questions were made to be answered and not to be kept. I think the words you stop yourself from saying

are the ones that will haunt you the longest Mind you it’s hard living in the world with regrets.”

Napatingin na lang ako sa hangin dahil sa aking narining mula sa kabilang linya. Itutuloy ko ba o hindi? Should I confront him? Or just wait until he’ll be the first one to open the topic? Pero kung maghihintay ako hanggang sa mangyayari then I might be waiting for something legendary.

“O siya bes, mamaya na tayo mag-usap ulit. Balitaan mo na lang ako sa mga mangyayari ah. May date kasi kami ni Alphonse so I have to go. Susunduin kasi niya ako kaya kailangan ko ng maghanda for our date.”

I heaved a deep sigh. “Ok, bye,” I mumbled.

“Break a leg bes,” pahabol niyang sabi bago ko ibaba ang telepono.

A flat tone linger on the other side of the phone as I held it in the air. Ibinalik ko sa pagkakapatong ang telepono sa cradle nito na nasa side table ng aking kama. Nabaling ang atensyon ko sa aking cell phone na nasa tabi naman nito. I have to be sure about this, sabi ng isang boses sa likod ng isip ko. Inabot ko ang aking telepono. I unlocked it by sliding my finger over the surface of the phone with a pattern. Then, I started typing on the screen keyboard with the thoughts of what  I’ve been wanting to say to Benjo and when I finished typing I hit the send button.

The sunshine beamed through the leaves and branches of the tree as the rays split into half. The wind blows gently whipping past my face as I circled my eyes around the park. I sat on the bench under the leaves and branches of a Narra tree that shades me from the harmful ultra-violet rays. I balled my fists. I’ve been waiting for a couple of minutes now.

Napag desisyunan ko na makipagkita kay Benjo kahit na alam kong busy siya sa panibagong proyekto na ginagawa nito. He assured me na pupunta siya kaya naman ay narito ako ngayon at hinihintay siya.