Downfall

Chapter 18 : Bestfriends to enemies

since that day, i don't know how i could tell my dad about it. so i decided to hide it. since he's been really busy travelling for his work. So tried the best that i could to bring the pieces back together before my dad comes home. so i planned a trip. Since it's almost Christmas, it is a day to be spend with family, so planned a trip for us three. My mom, me and Max.

I decided we should go to Singapore, since it has beautiful scenery and beautiful spots to see. i told my mom about it and she was excited.

i was packing all the things that are needed and even used my savings in the back for this trip. i already listed the things that we would do the moment we step foot in Singapore. I prepared the hotel, the tickets, everything. i just wanted for us to enjoy the moment and relive the past. maybe then my mother will remember how much she have loved my dad and the happy memories that we have shared as a family.

my brother was excited too. Well, he loves travelling.

then morning came, the flight day

i was so excited, my mother just told us to meet in the airport. we hurriedly went to the airport and waited for her. i thought it would be one of those beautiful memories, but then all the excitement vanish, the moment i saw it, i saw the guy with my mom, my mom smiling, coming towards us and she said

"oh, i invited him by the way, well, he really loves to go to singapore and he ask if he could come, you know, but he won't bother us really, he just will visit singapore and when we reach there, we will go our own separate ways"

separate ways huh! let's see

"oh, okay. as long as he'll go in his separate ways when we get there"

"yeah he will"

it was a 7 hour ride and it feels like forever already. i really don't like the aura of the thought that he's here with us. even though my mom says it's just in the ride. but i can't seem to like the feeling of it.

Finally, we arrived. as what we have agreed, he'll go to his separate ways but then

"Sam, can he come with us to the hotel? i mean, he is in a different room, he really doesn't know the place"

reasons again. i knew then that mom had no intention of being in a separate way with him but i just went with it. giving her chance

so, the guy came with us in the hotel, he was in room 207, we were in room 421. it was far. night came and my mom suddenly disappeared. she texted me that she'll be buying some foods. but hours pass by, she went out at 7, and it's already 10 pm and she hasn't come back home yet. i had a feeling he was with the guy but i ignored it. i don't want for these thoughts to ruin my trip, our family trip, the supposed to be family trip.

but right before i knew it, it was already ruined

wherever we go, the guy is there. 

i don't like it. i hate it

Then December 24 came, i repressed the thought again and just focused on celebrating christmas eve together. i was hoping that we would welcome christmas just the three of us. but that didn't happen. at exactly 12 am, my mother disappeared again. this time, i tried to go to the guy's room

i knew he was in room 207, so i went there

i didn't knock

i didn't want to let them know that i was eavesdropping and observing

i knew i shouldn't have done that. i knew it was a stupid decision. a mistake, a regret, but i heard the thing i didn't want to hear. then i realized that it was a wrong move. too late

i already knew

they were having a session. if you know what i mean

my heart was beginning to weaken, i was shaking, my feet got numb, i wanted to fall down, then i hurriedly went back to our room before i passed out, when i got there, i fell down in my knees and just cried out loud. 

i know my brother was shocked. 

but he came towards me, and hugged me, and let me cried for the rest of the night

since then, i hated her. i hated her for doing all the things she had done these past few months

the next morning when she came home, i was being silent all day. not being energetic. 

when evening came, around 8 pm to be exact, i confronted her, i asked her, 

"mom! why are you not inlove with dad anymore?"

"because, it's just like that"

bullshit

"you mean, it was all a lie? an act?"

"no, it's not like that, i loved your dad,  but i guess i couldn't take it any longer"

"then that's not love"

"what are you saying?"

"i mean, if you really love him, it wouldn't just disappear like that, what kind of crap is that?" i slipped. i knew i shouldn't have said that but out of anger, it didnt matter anymore

"what did you just say? are you cursing me now?"

"it's not like that mom, i just don't understand why you have to bring that guy here with us"

"don't be disrespectful"

"like he even deserves it. i hate him. i hate him for ruining our family"

"don't be like that, he's a good man, he was there when i needed a shoulder to lean on, he was there when i needed your dad the most"

"wow! so he's a superhero now? since when did villains become heroes?"

"Samantha! i told you that you won't understand, when you love someone, you'd do anything for them, your dad wasn't like that, when your granny was so mean and rash to me, when she discriminated me and mistreated me, did your dad do anything to protect me? no! he didnt. he said that i'll just let that old person because she's old"

"so now you are telling us that our dad was the worst person and that "that guy" was the best of all the best men out there?"

"yes! your dad will never be a match to him"

"wow! i can't believe that you can say that!"

"i thought that you would understand it, since you were my bestfriend, but i can't believe that you would be like this?" my mother said

"then what am i supposed to do? just let you make a sin?"

"that's not it, i thought you would be open-minded"

"do you think it's that easy?"

"that's why i am asking you to give him a chance"

"i wont. i will never let him"

"then whatever! besides you are just my daughter, you can't say anything that would change my mind. i am very disappointed at you"

Can she even hear the words she's saying? disappointed at me? what the hell is that?

i can't believe that my mom would choose him over me. her daughter. and she's saying that i'm keeping her from her happiness? bullshit! load of crap!

love? true love?

that doesnt exist

family?

what in the world is that word?

there is no happy family. all are bound to be broken

vows? wedding vows? that are just craps and lies

don't be fooled

i don't believe in such things anymore

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i was becoming numb again, angry towards humanity. i hate him. i hate my mom. i hate my dad. i hate everyone and everything in this world