Mechanical Heart

Chapter 3 (Edited)

Karita's Pov

"I'm sorry." I whispered

Our hands were in twined as we made our way back to our classes and I smiled at our hands. He slowed his pace so I could catch up to him. We weren't trying to be faster than one another, rather we were the same, we were one always by each others side. We were a synced dance, or the same heart. We were each other's. Our shadows leveled themselves next to each other. Side by side, side by side, Side by side. The most appealing words in history. We were side by side, walked side by side, cried Side by side, laughed side by side. It was beautiful to just be side by side, and I think it was what made 'us' work, the willingness to stay side by side.

"It's okay, Kar, you didn't even do anything. If anything I should be the one saying sorry." He smiled

"Side by side." I smiled back

"Side by side." He repeated and winked

I trudged in my heels to my next class, mentally groaning that I know had to sit myself in a prison like setting A.K.A a classroom. Xavier had to run to make it in time for his other classes. My heels scraped against the over walked upon floor, click-clack click-clack. The harshness of the sound matched with the harshness of the walls. Not only that but my heels were a dirty maroon color, like dried blood. Dried blood stains of the heart slowly used to cover the pins of sorrow. Wow, since when did I get so dark, this whole teenage angst was really becoming me. I felt as if somehow I'm learning to stand on my sorrows and hopefully arise from it. 

I came in contact with hard wood. The sound of my forehead greeting the wooden rusty worn out door was silenced by my loud gasp of shock. I stumbled back and muttered, I was so having a moment with my thoughts but was rudely interrupted with this wooden classroom door, talk about rude. I rubbed my bruised forehead and flipped off the wooden door. I huffed and puffed but the door did not come down so I proceeded to kick it. That method definitely worked, the door slammed open. And once again I managed to steal everyone's glances, oops that was not something I actually thought through. I smiled at my teacher who let out a frustrated sigh.

"Ms. Crystal, so nice of you to join us." He groaned in annoyance

"I am so nice to join you, Mr. Naldo." I smiled whispering under my breath.

I ignored his silly threats of getting me expelled, like that would ever happen, I practically gave this school their good reputation, they wouldn't touch a single hair on me. I placed myself beside Derek once again and was about to put my head down to get myself some rest but apparently Derek wanted to talk. Fuck, just my luck.

"Hey." He whispered

"What." I questioned raising up an eyebrow.

"How are you holding up?" He spoke softly

"What are you talking about?"

"You and Xavier, you seemed teary eyed."

I narrowed my eyes at him.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I muttered.

"I think you do know, so you aight?"

"It's my fucking business!"

"That doesn't mean I still can't look out you!"

My glare softened for a bit. He was just looking out for me so what was it that irked me about him trying to look out for me. I don't really know but he gave me that look, that look that said 'he was right'. That Xavier and I were just stupid teenagers who were a bunch of troubled teens that eventually was going to blow up. And Derek would be there with a rose in his hand a box of ice cream and smug look with the words 'I told you so' taunting me over and over again. But Xavier and I weren't that, we were going to work, so what's with that look that he was giving me. He didn't understand, he couldn't possible understand. I think that's what irked me. It irked the living hell out of me.

"I don't need people looking out for me." I snapped.

"What the fuck is your problem, Kar?"

"What's my problem? You're the one getting all up in my business. I'll tell you this once and once only don't get yourself involved in my mess. My life, my problem. Stay out of it."

I got up, grabbed my books and bag and sped out of the classroom. I could feel his eyes on me throughout the entire way but that didn't matter, it was my problem not his. He didn't have to ask,  and he didn't have to know. No one has to know, it's just us, Xavier and me. Xavier and me, only us, because we were going to work by depending on each other. Not Derek. I ran a hand through my tangled hair, I can't just can't keep getting close to other people not when everyone had their judgemental opinions regarding us and was always ready to slap a 'told you so' at me every time we got into a little conflict. I can't do this. Breathe Karita Breathe, it's going to be okay. Okay, it is all going to be okay. I'm okay yes I'm okay. I'm strong, and I can do this. I have Xavier, side by side. I smiled, a crooked warm smile, it was not picture perfect but I know it was real. I was real. I heard my name being called, I spun on my heels to satisfy my curiosity. Xavier. He was calling out for me. I took a step further and further and further. I reached out my hands. I tried to reach for him, my star, my love, my Xavier. My knees buckled and I felt my legs slip under me. That's all I noticed before a wave of darkness hit me. Fuck, it hit me hard.