SCENERY / Taejin

17. Perfect Sense

I don't remember any occasions in the many,many years that we had spent together when Jin-hyung ever looked at me or anyone for that matter with an expression as intense as that. It surprised me too much to fathom it properly. But he discarded it a second later and gleefully joined Chamin in preparing dinner.

They laughed and joked over dinner like they had known each other for a decade. I was glad hyung was opening up to my friend but then,he started to completely ignore me. He avoided my gaze all evening and spoke nothing more than what was necessary. I decided that a good night's rest would clear up any confusion between us but it didn't.

The next day, hyung was up and on the snow slopes already before I had even woken up. When approached to do anything together, he only answered saying he wanted to make the most of the trip with his favourite activity and sped off alone. I was dejected; I had so much hopes for a lot of quality times.

I sat down on an outdoor bench and took out my camera,taking pictures of him and the beautiful white scenery around, a bit comforted thinking of the memories I was capturing of him. Chamin came up to me and peered through my shoulders.

"See something you like?", he grinned motioning to the zoomed-in shot of hyung on my screen.
I smirked sheepishly.

He sat down beside me, "Why are you here and not out there?"

"Skiing's....and the cold's not my strongest point," I answered hesitantly.

"I know you'd bury yourself in the snow for a week if it means you can be near Seokjin-ssi. Come on, spill. What's the matter?" He pressed on.

I sighed. "For some reason..he's been a bit...unapproachable today."

Chamin frowned and looked over at said person climbing up the slope slowly. Hyung huffed tiredly as he reached the top and turned around to meet our eyes. He shifted his gaze swiftly, his expression absent of any friendliness, completely ignoring us and made his way down on his ski poles again.

"Ah! Wait!", Chamin exclaimed and placed his hand on my shoulders. "Do..do you think he's jealous?"

"Jealous? Jin-hyung?"

He nodded.

"But....why?"

At this Chamin shook his head, lifting his hands from my shoulders dramatically as if he was touching something dirty.

"I can't believe I'm saying this... but I think he's jealous of you with me." Chamin grimaced.
"I never thought of him as the jealous type but it makes sense now. He must have thought I was interested in you when I tried to tease you yesterday. Eww,"
He shifted in his seat,moving away from me.

"Wwhat?? Wait..but that," I tried to grab my friend but he wiggled around laughing more at our expense.

"Yahh! Come back here!"

"No way. I don't want to get in between your two jealous asses," Chamin was practically prancing around, making faces and making me laugh too.

We were interrupted by hyung's ski poles hitting the wooden table infront of us. His arrival and our conversation a minute ago shut the both of us up and we shifted uncomfortably, me in seat and my friend behind me.

"Ah..I actually came to tell you guys something," Chamin exclaimed putting a hand on my shoulder again but jerking it off almost immediately alarmed. This made me chuckle and hyung looked at us puzzled.

"What is it?," Jin-hyung finally spoke, taking the seat opposite us.

"Well.. it's kinda bad news. My supervisor just informed me that a whole group of students are coming for a field trip tomorrow. It was originally scheduled for the day after but some complications happened. I just wanted to tell you guys if it's going to be an inconvenience for you here.." Chamin voice trailed off feeling sorry.

"Ah..yes,with that many people, it'll be a bad idea for us to stay," hyung replied,
"Thank you for informing us, Chamin-ssi," and he smiled at him.

Chamin mumbled nervously and excused himself to go back inside.

The two of us sat in silence for a while. I stared at the picture of hyung on my camera and he played nervously with his fingers.

"I'm sorry our trip has to end this way," he finally spoke.

I looked up and opened my mouth to speak but I just nodded instead. I wanted to ask him a thousand questions then; mainly about what Chamin had said but I didn't.

8PM that evening, we packed and made our way to the car to return. I gave Chamin a tight hug before we part again. He left hurriedly upon a phone call from his boss, waving us good bye as he ran in.
I turned to see hyung putting our bags inside the car. He looked as upset as I was. I didn't want to leave. Not yet. I wanted a little more time with him. It wasn't enough. I stood there stalling as hyung too slowly made his way to the driver's seat.

"Hyung!" I called out and he halted, his hands already on the handle.

"Hmm?," he looked up puzzled.

"I-I have something to ask,"

"..now? Can't you say it inside?"

"No.", I walked over and stood facing him.

"What exactly? What is it?"

"Well....."I gulped.

"What?"

"Well....do you..."

"Ahh..hurry up. It's cold." Hyung nagged childishly.

"Do you...no..Were you jealous thinking Chamin and I were interested in each other?" I stared into his eyes. We were of the same height but hyung suddenly seemed to slump beneath me as my chest heaved up in anticipation.

"W-what? What do you mean by that?" His eyes widened.

"You've been weird since yesterday. And all day today. Chamin said.....you might be..because well..." I mumbled not entirely confident.

"Well...well," hyung stuttered,
"Well...NO! But you asked me on this trip but then you...you looked like you were having more fun with him.... I mean..that's okay....but then you should have come alone.....you didn't have to ask me...to...come..."
he struggled to continue, his face flushed red again but not because of the cold.

It didn't make sense. Nothing he just said made sense as an adult. It was just childish reasoning. Yet, Chamin said I had to bolder and that was all I needed to hear from hyung to do it.

I smiled and leaned in suddenly, kissing him.

Hyung's body shook a little at the surprise but he didn't push me away. I closed my eyes, my lips pressed to his, unmoving and waiting for a reaction.

After what seemed like the longest 3 seconds of my life, hyung returned the kiss; his plump lips pressing deeper into mine. I opened my eyes slightly and saw his face tilted and eyes closed in anticipation.

My lips curled into a smile; I wrap my arms around his waist and pulled him closer, deepening our kiss.

The questions could wait. The explanations could wait. The whole world could wait.
I had the love of my life in my arms, kissing me and that was the only thing that made perfect sense to me at the moment.