SCENERY / Taejin

25. Scenery

I hum softly as I look around the black and grey studio, my knees shaking nervously and also out of excitement. Yoongi-hyung was on the phone when I arrived and he motioned me to wait for his call to end.

My fingers trailed over the mixing console and the instruments, halting when I come across the keyboard. All my life I've been familiar around these things. But it feels a bit strange today. I stopped singing years ago, never even attempted to again even once but here I am now.

My eyes wander to the picture frames on the wall. There's mostly trophies but a few are of his family and holly, his poodle and two frames of us. One is a picture of us in our debut years. A little giggle comes to me looking at our plump cheeks and eyeliners. The other is the one we had taken on our trip to the Grammys. We were in suits but laughing as if kids on their first field trip. The seven of us look good together, look happy and complete. Life has thrown us in seperate ways now. It's inevitable  but it makes me sad that it happend sooner than we had thought.

"So? What's the deal with the surprise visit?" Hyung's voice startled me back to the room.

"Ah..well..on the phone..I told you..." I smile sheepishly making my way to the sofa.

"You phoned to talk about a song at 10PM in the night." He crosses his arms, leaning back on his chair.

"I knew you'd still be working..so," I flashed him my most innocent box smile.

He sighs, " What's this song you're talking about?"

"Just a song..."

"Don't beat around the bush. You don't just give up your singing career for 4 whole years and come running at 10PM for 'just a song'. Spill it."

I chew on my bottom lip for moments before answering,
"Well...it's for Jin-hyung.."
I look away from his stare.

"Say what?"

"For Jin-hyung."

"I heard that. But What do you mean?"

"The thing is... I decided to let everyone know that it was my fault for the scandals years ago. I'm late...and our hyung is gone because of that...and I don't want to be a coward anymore."
I look down at the floor, anticipating whatever scolding I was about to receive...but I only hear him give out a big sigh.

"You're gonna lose everything.." he states nonchalantly.

"I know."

"And a whole lot of drama is going to follow."

"I know that too."

"This won't just bring Jin-hyung back."

I gulp, my nose tingling with hot air.
"I know.."

"And you'll be ok with all of that?"

"I will."

We sit in silence for a couple of seconds and hyung starts nodding.
"Okay..do you have an idea on how it's going to be?"

"Yeah..I have some of the lyrics written already...
Wait..you're really helping me?" I sit up straight, surprised and too happy to believe it.

"Didn't you ask me to?"

I nodded frantically, beaming.

Hyung smirks and lets out a tiny laugh,
"I'll talk to Namjoon tomorrow. Go home and sleep now. Let's meet up again this weekend."

My face hurts from smiling too much and I give him a tight hug before I leave for home.

I open the doors to my apartment and fall down on the bed. I'm exhausted, having walked for a good distance because I didn't bring my car. But I couldn't stop smiling. I was excited, nervous but happy about how things had turned out today. Happy I finally found the strength to finally start something.