Deep Monologues

Story of Her Life

A/N: this part is mainly for my friends to read but its fine for you guys to read it I'm just letting you guys know that this portion is for me friends :p (awkward Bean)

She was born in the year 2001 in mid-September, a week pass on the day she was due. She was different the moment she was born. Every one knew that. But her being different didn't give her a warning of whatever challenged she had faced over the course of her life.

At the age of three she was sick. She wasn't born with the strongest immunity out there. Every month or two you would see her in the hospital or Emergency Room. Doctors trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with her. She's so close to death that she can see the dead.

The age of four, she started cutting herself. Her mother that is filled with nothing but hate towards her made her fill numb so she needs to know if she still is alive. Deep cuts all over her hand, wrist, legs, and torso. She cut and cut until, she could no longer feel the pain and stop at the age of six. Her mother, was nothing but filled with jealousy and false "I love you".

By the age of seven, she started school. She was always the victim on the playground. Every little girl and boy wanna mess with her. Why? She was different. The school teachers did nothing but watch for which they fear her. She was helpless. She endured every kick, punch, and beat down everyday.

At the age of eight, she was recognized as a gifted student. Her talents was unlike anyone. Which would cause jealousy amongst her classmates especially amongst the girls. Winning tournaments, contests, and receiving awards was something she would get constantly. It made people envious of who she is so they decided to destroy that. They were successful. It took years, but they were able to destroy her. Her passion for music, art, and athletics was taken away from her. Taken away by the people who were jealous of her being good at nearly everything. So, she hides a large portion of her and pretends that she doesn't know how to play that instrument or know how to draw that. She even has gotten to the length where she plays dumb at times hiding her smarts. In fear, that people will do it again.

By the age of nine, she lost her family. Her mother never loved her father. Instead of someone in her mother's past. Her false love drove my father into despair and infinite sadness, rage, and lost. He was gone and forgot the one thing that he loved in the dark. She was alone with no one to depend one but herself. Her father loved her with all of his heart, but the untrue love of her mother, destroyed him. But yet she still smiles despite the pain and huge scar that lays in her chest.

At the age of ten, she became depressed. She smiled a lot less now. She lies about her well being. She pushes everyone away that tries to help her. Most importantly her grandmother controlled her life as a puppet. Forcing her to be someone she isn't. Losing what she truly is. Setting up marriages for her but failed. Her grandmother doesn't see her as a human. But an item to show off like a trophy.

At the age of eleven, she starved herself. She didn't feel like she was pretty and is very insecure of her own body. She would go days or weeks without eating only drinking water for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. No one didn't see what she was doing to her body. Until she collapsed. No one asked why she did it. But they forced her to eat and every minute she hate it.

At the age of twelve, she became suicidal and a monster. Her mind keeps trying to kill her. Her mind told her to hurt others. She felt like she was a danger to others and herself. She was incapable to live amongst society. She had plans and who to target in her school. She was a potential school shooter. It wasn't only that. She attempt to kill herself. Each time was a failed attempt. A failed attempt to kill the monster she is. She couldn't handle being alive. She didn't want to do it but to her it felt like a good idea. So good, that she got admitted in to the local mental institution to protect her along with others. It was told she was gonna transfer for the criminally insane for which she was the great likely-hood of being a killer causing her to stay there for a lifetime. Giving electroshock therapy and medications. But after a almost a whole month of being gone she felt a bit stable and was release. But as she left one thing that kept on her mind was that she couldn't live up to see her 16th birthday.