SECOND CHANCE.

01

Shakeesha's POV.

Its been a month since Sparks threw me out of his pack and life. A month of me living in self pity and wallowing in my bedroom. Which was such a mess because I was too depressed to look after it. A month of me having to endure pack members from my own pack shunning me away. A month of me in constant regret and self loathing. My mother has not looked at me since my father brought me home. My teenage twin brothers have resorted to acting like I don't exist. If our eyes meet anywhere in the house or around the pack, they glare and scowl at me. The only one oblivious to all of this is my four year old little sister, Carly. She is the only one who still loves and smiles at me.

On the first week I was ecstatic to be home. Idiotic of me, I know. And the most absurd thing was that I still had the guts to think William and I will have our happily ever after. Back when we were still together we had sworn to never be seperated, even by mates. Stupid puppy love makes one so narrow minded. I can still remember what happened when I went by his house to see him.

*****flashback*****

It was on a Wednesday morning when I decided to go and pay him a visit so that we could talk and catch up on the missing four years of our lives. I took a shower, put on make up and even wore the yellow sundress he loved to see me in. My stomach was full of butterflies when I thought about his reaction upon seeing me. Through out the way I kept envisioning how our meeting would be. Was he going to be happy to see me? Has he missed me?Had he fulfilled the promised we made about not letting mates separate us? Going to his place with a racing heart, I finally spot his house. There were toy cars outside and a swing set. My stomach dropped but I assumed maybe he had shifted and the house belonged to a person with a family.

Taking a deep breath, I ring the doorbell. I hear shuffling on the otherside. Blood was rushing to my ears,  my heart was beating so hard It was a little bit difficult to breath. When the door opens up, deep emerald green look at me with shock. He was still handsome as I remembered. His jet black hair shaved at the sides and his curls resting messily in the middle of his head. His thin lips at an 'o' shape with the shock of seeing me at his doorstep.
"Hi, " I say to William. I go to hug him but he pushes me away. I swallow the pain of his rejection and smile brightly. He looks at me for a long moment and I shuffle on the spot getting a little uncomfortable. I hear a little shuffling behind him, and clinging on his leg is an adorable baby boy who is an exact replica of him. He looks curiously at me and I find myself not being able to breath. I stare at the child and William picks him up and settles him on his hip comfortably.
"What are you doing here?" He finally asks. His voice deep and flat. No emotion whatsoever. His eyes become dull and his face stoic.
"I came back for you, " I say, trying my hardest to keep the smile on my face despite his noncholancy on my arrival but my eyes keep darting on the baby resting his head on Williams shoulder. He sees me and waits for me to question the obvious but I don't. Afraid of what I might hear, I keep my mouth shut at the moment.
"Why?" He raises a bushy eyebrow at me.
" Because we promised and swore to love each other and no mates would separate us, " I answer confusedly. I was hurt he had forgotten our pledge to each other. He looked at me for a very long moment then bursts out laughing , Jolting the baby from his comfortable position before he pats the baby's back to calm him. He wiped the tears from his eyes before regaining his cold demeanor.
" What? Are you insane? We were eighteen. Just kids. Pathetic teens who were blinded by pathetic puppy love.  What is wrong with you? What makes you think that I would leave my own mate, someone destined to love me unconditionally, for you?" He sneered.
I stared at him dumb founded. I was so hurt I was sure I heard my heart cracking. Is this the same William who promised me an eternity of love.
"What?" I finally manage to blurt out. Overwhelmed with what I heard,  I just stared at him like a moron.
He sighs in fatigue and  says in a tone edging to sympathy and his eyes soften a little.
"Shakeesha just leave. Theres nothing here for you anymore. Am happy with my mate and triplets. You did a mistake jepordising yours. Am sorry you did not embrace your mate. Thats not on me, its on you.  I kindly suggest you leave my property and deal with your own mess without including me in it. I already moved on and to be frank am happy with how it went. To be honest I am glad it wasn't you that got to be my mate because we just dragged each other down. We never accomplished anything together. But we were kids. However I would have thought you getting a mate would have made you see the mature side of life. I guess not. Goodbye Shakeesha, " before he could slam the door on my face I heard a soft feminine voice inside,
"Honey? Who is at the door? And is kenny with you?"
" No one important baby,just a sales man and yes I have him,  " he says looking straight at me and finally closes the door. Giving me the que to get out of his life. I stare at the door for a long time before leaving and walking home depressed.
Second time I have been thrown out. That has to be a record.

*********end of flashback***

No one important
No one important
No one important.
The word kept replaying in my head like a broken CD. I was mostly wallowing in my room because everywhere I went people shunned me. The words William had told me cut so deep in me that I lost the will of life. I did not want to do anything. I had lost a couple of pounds and my eyes had massive bags underneath. I was broken. My wolf had left me when Spark threw me out. I had no one to talk to. I finally understood how Sparks felt. With that revelation I cried for causing him pain. I was a pathetic excuse of a mate. The only person I was destined to love, I ended up hurting him in the most despicable ways. Karma was finally paying back. I decide to go downstairs for a cup of warm milk.
My twin brothers, Sam and Sid,  come downstairs. They were laughing at something on Sid's phone but when they see me, they stop and glare at me.
"What?!" I snap. I was tired of their bs.
"Feel that? The anger? The fatigue? The hopelessness? The rejection?  Thats what you put Alpha Sparks through everyday for four good years, " Sid says to me. His voice low but viscious. His words make my throat clog. I shrink back but still manage to glare.
" Is that the same glare you used to give to your mate when he would do everything to make your stay comfortable?" He continues taunting me. I shrink further on myself. His words hitting straight home.
"You brought this upon yourself now deal with it. You are my sister but you disgust me. To be honest am happy for Sparks. He got rid of a nasty poison from his pack. You lied to everyone. You mistreated them. Even puppies, " he scoffs in disbelief, " Shakeesha what is wrong with you? You are twenty three years old. When will you mature. Is that an example to set to our four year old sister? How will Carly behave towards her mate when she becomes eighteen when she hears about your despicable behaviour? She sees you as a role model and will follow every decision you make. I will be there day in and day out to remind you of what you have done until you do something about it, " he says to me. His glare on me so strong I can feel it in my soul.
"As if she can. All she has been doing is plotting on how to get William back, who has a mate by the way, instead of fighting for her own mate. Pathetic if you ask me, " Sid says to Sam.
"No one asked you, " I mumble to him.
"And Sparks didn't ask for a bitch as a mate but got it anyway. But hey, who is complaining, " Sid sneers with so much venom I recoil back.
"Look Shakeesha, you feeling sorry for yourself isnt helping anyone. This is all your fault. Am not going to sugar coat anything for you. I mean,  you wasted four years obsessing over someone who moved on and has a beautiful family of his own. You rejecting your mate is an abomination on its own. And unless you do something about it, there is no love and support you are going to get from us. That is nothing but horse shit in my eyes when you have done nothing,  for a whole month to rectify your shitty behaviour with your mate, his family and pack. So get your shit together before dad throws you out in the streets, " Sam says with a much calmer tone. His voice hard but a little warm.
"I don't know what to do, " I say meekly. Feeling defeated.
"Sparks has been fighting for you for four years, four years trying to make you comfortable, happy and contented with the pack. I think you already know what to do, you just don't have the guts to do it, " Sam says softly.
They leave me there on the kitchen island with tears running down my cheeks. I run to my room and jump on my bed. I cry so hard my head and chest aches. My eyes are puffy, my throat dry and face swollen. I have been such a fool. I've wasted four years on things that did not matter at all.

It took me a whole month to finally realise I had commited a grave mistake. I was a total bitch to Sparks, my wonderful mate, and his family for no reason at all. We had no say on who our mates are but it was our duty to make the connection work. Am a horrible wolf. No wonder no one in the pack wants me around. I rejected my mate, an offence punishable by being banished from the pack and becoming a rogue.I was despicable to treat him the way I did. But I was going to rectify them. I am going to fight for him. I wont give up. I will beg him on my knees if need be for him to give me a second chance. I would not be surprised if he didn't give me one. I wouldn't give me a chance if I was him. I was horrible. But first I had to rush into the human city to get some school supplies for Carly.