Forever And Ever (BTS)

Chapter 11

The boys sat around the dining table, eating their breakfast. Mr Kim was still hungover from the previous night, as usual. Even Mrs Kim was silent. She was tired, her workload had increased because she had to tend to the boys more to make sure they were safe. Her boss had also given her more shifts. She knew she barely had any energy to do them, but since she was now the sole breadwinner of the family, she had to take on as many shifts as possible to earn enough money. The boys could all tell that she was gradually getting more and more worn out, but she wouldn't listen when they tried to tell her that she didn't have to put so much pressure on herself to earn money. They had tried several times. 

Gone were the days where everyone had conversations during meals. Before, the kids would tell their parents everything about school, what they learnt, their teachers. But now, there was nothing but silence. No one talked, not even a single word. The only time any child spoke was to thank Mr and Mrs Kim for the meal after eating. Family meals were no longer a time of enjoyment and laughter. It was dull, and full of fear. Mr Kim looked angry all the time now, and no one wanted mealtime to be even more tainted than it already was. But sometimes, Mr Kim would mutter things to himself. The rest of the table would catch a word here and there, like "brats". It wasn't hard to imagine what he was saying. It was always a kick in the gut and a stab in the heart for the boys, who were still trying to come to terms with the fact that the father they had admired and loved was gone.

This morning, though, Mr Kim got a little more vocal than usual.

Jungkook finished his helping of omelette. He was still a little hungry, though, so he went to get a second serving from the kitchen. When he came back, Mr Kim looked at his plate with disdain, and said, "What do you think you're doing, boy, you're already fat enough." Everyone's eyes widened. Even in all his drunk tantrums, Mr Kim had never directly insulted and belittled one of the boys before. Jungkook started to tear up, but he quickly wiped his eyes before Mr Kim could see. He slowly took his plate back to the kitchen and remained hungry. He stood in the kitchen, contemplating. Jungkook had been the tiniest bit chubby since birth, but no one had thought it was a problem. Everyone thought it was cute, in fact. It was the first time someone had said anything different, and hearing it from his father made him confused. Was he actually too chubby? Or should he believe his brothers? Maybe Mr Kim had always thought he was fat, and being drunk made him speak more honestly. And maybe his brothers were just being super nice to him because they didn't want him to feel bad.

This was the start of the little five-year-old boy's problems. 

Lunch time arrived in school, all the children rushing to the canteen. Because they were still too young, the teachers gave meals out one by one instead of having stalls for them to buy food. Jungkook's plate of food was placed on the table in front of him. He inspected what was given. Some pasta, two apples, and a drink. Jungkook thought very carefully. Which one could he eat without getting fatter? He eventually chose to have the drink and one apple. The teacher walked past him and noticed that he wasn't eating anything else. She was puzzled. He always finished his food, and often even asked for more. Why was he not today? "Jungkook, are you alright? You're not eating." Jungkook nodded, "I'm okay, I'm just not very hungry today, Miss." He crossed his fingers under the table, hoping she would be convinced. Thankfully she walked away with no doubt. He looked down at the food once again. He wanted so badly to finish it, but he wanted to get skinnier. Then, perhaps his father would be a bit happier and not be so angry. So he watched his plate get taken away, hoping no one else would hear how his stomach continued to growl. 

It was dinnertime at the Kims'. Again, seven boys sat at the table, waiting for dinner to be served. Mrs Kim now handled dinner on her own, with Mr Kim unable to in his drunken stupor. She got a surprise, and not a pleasant one, when Jungkook went up to her and asked for a smaller portion. She agreed, but she didn't feel right about it. Nonetheless, she let it be and followed his request. Maybe he ate too much in school. 

The other boys were surprised too. "Jungkookie, since when did you eat so little? Are you unwell?" Yoongi asked. Jungkook replied, "I just don't have much of an appetite today." They were skeptical, but Jungkook had never lied before, so they decided not to push further. But there was a gut feeling in all of them that something wasn't quite right with their little brother.