South Sudan
February 2017
Bea arrived yesterday in South Sudan, with swollen eyes, quiet, and fake smiling at whatever her best friend is saying.
When she saw the covered court where the patients are all gathered, nagmelt yung puso niya at alam niyang she made the right decision.
Sobrang daming tao, sobrang sikip. Although marami nang volunteers, parang kulang pa din to help everyone in the community. Bea's task is to check the kids first. When she arrived, kahit may jet lag, nilapag lang niya ang gamit sa isang nipa hut assigned to her and Zel at dumiretso na sa court.
Since sobrang gulo na nga ng body clock ni Bea, hindi pa siya nakakatulog since she arrived. Zel is concerned na, pero wala din siyang time kausapin ang kaibigan. There are memos around na there will be more doctors coming.
Nurse Cath went to Bea.
"Doc, you're here na pala," Cath greeted the tired doctor.
"Yeah, just yesterday. You rested ba?" Bea asked.
"Yes. Hindi ka pa daw natutulog. Pahinga ka muna kaya. Dadating din naman yung mga doctors from Europe eh."
Napatigil si Bea sa binabasa niyang records and tumingin sa kaibigang nurse.
"Don't tell me," she warned her.
"I'm afraid, yeah. He's coming too."
"Shet!" Bea cursed.
"I'll take a rest. San si Zel?" she asked.
"Resting also. Madami namang doctors in charge. Baka ikaw naman magkasakit," sermon ni Cath.
So she left some patients' records with Cath and went sa tinutuluyan nila ni Zel.
"ZEL!!" tawag ni Bea sa kaibigan.
Napamulat at bumangon agad naman si Zel sa gulat at tiningnan si Bea na nagpipigil ng tawa.
"Tanga ka talaga," iritang sabi ni Zel.
"Anyways, may problema ako."
"Kung sasabihin mong binreakan mo si Thirdy bago ka pumunta dito at kailangan mo ng tulong, wala na ko mabibigay. Tanga ka talaga sa pag-ibig."
"Uhm, no, hindi yon problema ko. Pero pano mo nalaman?"
"Kuya Loel called kanina. Kakausapin ka sana ni Tito Elmer, pero you left your phone dito kaya pala di nasagot," sermon ni Zel.
"Okay, tyaka na muna yung Thirdy problems. Max will be coming. Nagvolunteer din yung hospital nila."
"Pake ko kay Max," sabi ni Zel, pero nung nagsink in sa kanya sinong Max ang pinaguusapan nila, tumingin siya kay Bea.
"YOU MEAN MAX? AS IN MAXWEL? Shet!"
"I mean, okay naman na ko. I moved on naman na, and kasal na siya, and I'm happy, perooo baka kasi hindi pa ko handang makita siya."
"Feeling ko makikipagsuntukan ako after I rest. Hayup na yon," nakasimangot na sabi ni Zel.
"This is an emergency mission naman. Hindi naman na siya siguro mangungulit," sabi ni Bea.
"Okay, sabay tayo ng shifts. Hindi ka aalis sa tabi ko. I'll protect you."
"Okay. Thanks, Zel! I love you! Anong gagawin ko if wala ka?" Bea hugged her best friend.
Zel broke the hug and said, "Pero tanga ka pa din to ask for a breakup just because South Sudan needs you. Kahit presidente pa ng South Sudan gusto ka batukan sa katangahan mo."
"Zel, remember the reason why bakit ayaw ko maattach?"
"Because you don't like to have the ability to hurt someone?"
"Yeah. I saw how he's hurting just because of this setup. Believe me, Zel, wala akong ginawa sa plane kung hindi umiyak. Isipin mo, iniisip niya na ayaw ko siyang kasama sa future eh tangina, siya nga ata future ko." Bea is sobbing now.
"Tinanong niya ko paano daw if ever na magsettle down na kami, iggive up niya ba daw yung restaurant niya. Hindi naman yon yung gusto ko. Bakit kasi sobrang hirap?" she added.
"So yung solution is to give up on the relationship and ghost everyone again?"
"Yes. I would rather be bruised because I left him than see him hurting like that."
"Tanga ka talaga." Zel hugged her again and patted her back.
"Bea, I hope you realize that ghosting him will haunt you every day. Hindi mo man lang siya pinag-explain. Inunahan mo siya to fight for your relationship. Honestly, mahal kita, Beatriz, pero nung first time kang nagghost ng isang taon, sobrang sama ng loob ko non sayo kasi feeling ko nakalimutan mo na madaming nagmamahal sayo dahil lang sa lokong Maxwel na hindi ka mahal. Isipin mo, isa lang siya against samin ah, pero ganun yung effect sayo. Pero look at Thirdy, he's willing to do anything for you, just for you to stay. Pero anong ginawa mo? Ginawa mo pa din yung safest thing to do for you."
Bea is just listening and wiping her tears.
"Although you ghosting us is not scary, you know what's scary?" Zel asked.
"If magjjoke ka, stop pls," Bea answered.
"No. Mas scary yung mga rason mo. Akala ng iba nagiging selfish ka kasi ayaw mo masaktan, pero listening to you, your reason is so selfless. You're going away because you see yourself as a disease with no cure. Let Chef Thirdy be your cure naman, Bei. Just try."
"Pero I broke up with him." She's sobbing louder now.
"Tanga ka kasi talaga."
Tumayo si Zel at iniwan si Bea sa kwarto.
"Magluluto ako ng canned tuna. Pagtapos mo umiyak, lumabas ka na," utos ni Zel na dumiretso sa kitchen.
Bea took her time to cry her heart out.
