Sanders Sides School For The Troubled Youth

Chapter 5: Remy

Song: Acid rain by Lorn

Tw: Underage drinking, Eating disorder, Someone has a full on mental breakdown (mood) UNHhhh depression so much depression, Joan has 1 line and I gave up on making it in character (I'm writing the triggers while very sleep deprived how ironic is that)

Y'know this chapter was dark but then Roman came in and it got D A R K (He wasn't even in the first draft like what the hell happened, big fat projection happened that's what)

Remy was sure whoever made them exist had a sick sense of humor because their life was one big ironic joke. They were an insomniac with narcolepsy. They were an extrovert who most of all loved the silence of the night. They hated how empty they felt all the time but loved walking through empty streets They wanted to become something better, create something bigger but they couldn't even get themselves through a day of school.

Daylight

"How have you been feeling lately?" Picani asked. Remy could miss out on their own birthday but they would never miss their time with the therapist. It was like an anchor keeping them grounded in time and space to know that they would see the kind man every 2 weeks.

To answer the question they just shrugged before sipping the straw on their iced coffee.

"Well that doesn't seem good does it. Sometimes letting your emotions out is good. Have you perhaps tried screaming at the top of your lungs?"

"Many times hun. Nothing gets me going like waking up the neighborhood while screeching like a hyena"

"...Ok. Maybe there are better ways. Have you tried writing letters to yourself? Sometimes it helps to get all your thoughts down on paper. Or crying. Crying is a classic but it works"

"I don't even remember the last time I cried. Stone cold baby" They said knocking at the place on their chest their heart was at.

That was a lie. A tear or two ran down their cheek every now and then but they never knew why. They could just be out walking and then suddenly they were tearing up or in the middle of a laugh their eyes got red from water forming.

"Remy" Emile called out now with a serious tone. "I understand that your habit of sneaking out at night and skipping classes and probably breaking laws are coping mechanisms-"

"I literally got sent here for breaking the law so like you can take away the probably"

"That doesn't mean you're still doing it"

"I am"

"Well then. That is a good thing to talk about next time" He quickly wrote something down in his notepad. "As I was saying breaking laws and etc are coping mechanisms and without them you would most likely be back in a figurative hole but keeping this mask up of yours isn't healthy. In multiple ways since lack of sleep can negatively affect your memory and weaken your immune system but also because you can't always laugh and pretend like nothing"

"You're pretending like nothing's have happened right now"They growled which was very unusual of them since they rarely got angry. 

"I presumed you didn't want to talk about it"

"Of course I don't!" They didn't waste another second before storming out of the room. They didn't want to talk they wanted a time machine so they could go back 3 weeks and change what they had done.

In bad dreams

In a cool world

They got no air as they got pushed around between people, they danced but felt nothing at all. The club was small and changed from red to blue to green every third second as the neon lights switched. Everything was going to fast and before they knew it the strangers they called their friends for the night had left. Breathe, breath they thought but everything was too warm. They saw someone talk to them but they couldn't hear a thing. Maybe the music was too loud or the words just didn't go into their brain.