Sanders Sides School For The Troubled Youth

Chapter 8: Dee

Song: Genghis Khan by Miike snow (You won't regret watching the music video)

Tw: Vomiting (Withdrawal is not nice sorry), manipulation, Talk about substance abuse, exactly 1 swear word, sexual innuendos and other normal Remus things, toxic relationship(s?)

Me @Deceit in literally every one of my fics: I grant you the power of abandonment issues

Remus was disturbed, more so than usual. 

After waking up in the hospital his parents had visited once. He threw pillows and screeched until they left.

Remy came by during the night leaving presents (Coffee) or get well cards if their friend was asleep but if he was awake they laid next to him under the covers in the bed. Listening closely as the currently detoxing boy complained about how the whole room was spinning and how his thoughts wouldn't shut up about death.

Virgil came by a few times with his art supplies. He watched intently as paper after paper got filled and tried to do the same. Remus praised him even though Virgil thought his nearly wasn't as good enough. He had to force the pen out of the other's hand as he looked physically exhausted.

Dee visited the most. Talking about what had happened while he was gone, saying how much he had missed him and playing with his hair until his best friend felt better. Remus pretty much threw himself at him the moment he got inside the door and then he didn't let go of him until he left. When Dee tried to nudge him away he just flopped down on top of him again putting his arms around him like tentacles. In short he had somehow got even clingier.

Roman didn't visit at all.

The first night he was back at the school spiders were crawling under his skin and there was a storm in his stomach. The first night back he spent screaming and sweating. After the incident he wasn't allowed to go outside the school building anymore so even if he wanted to run out into the woods and hide away he couldn't.

It wasn't because of pain he was screaming. It was from his thoughts. Without his 'medication' they were tumbling around in his head making him imagine things that made his knees weak. Usually he didn't mind it but now he could almost hear his parents saying he was a bad person. He tried to draw. To get the thoughts out but his whole body was shaking. Dee muffled the screaming by holding his hand over the other's mouth cooing that it would be okay.

The second day he spent in the bathroom. Puking up everything he ate and feeling bile rise whenever he moved. Logan was there to make sure he drank enough water and to hold up his hair. He wasn't easily disgusted so he didn't mind. 

Then Dee came and forced him out. Telling Logan it was better if he took care of him since they were better friends and telling Remus his classmate left because he thought he was being annoying.

The third day Remus got anxious by anything and nothing. A shadow was a serial killer and one wrong look meant everyone hated him. Virgil listened to him until Remus was sobbing into his hands. The emo did his best to support him since he knew how it felt.

Eventually Dee came and got mad at Virge for 'upsetting' Rem and telling Remus he left because his crying made him uncomfortable actually his entire personality made him uncomfortable. He had been trying so hard to make his relatively new classmate like him. He'd done his best to censor himself and all. Was he really so despicable. Maybe he was just broken or maybe he was just made to be d̶e̶a̶d̶ alone. At least he still had Dee. He reminded himself to continue doing as he said so he wouldn't hate him too. 

It's a cheat somewhere

'Cause I don't really want you, girl

But you can't be free