Sanders Sides School For The Troubled Youth

:):):):):):):):):)

Song: Obsessions by Marina 

Also Smoke and Guns by Natewantstobattle is basically a demus song if their relationship was healthy and not this: tw: Emotional & physical abuse, manipulation, substance abuse, Roman gets dumb bitch disease and in this economy can you blame him?

Sunday, wake up, give me a cigarette

Last night's love affair is looking vulnerable in my bed

These days Remus was mostly just numb. He willfully accepted every kiss or hug he got even as it felt like ice going over his skin slowly turning into water that drowned him. Cuddling with Dee used to be the highlight of his week and he hated that now it felt like poison on his skin whenever they touched.  His days turned into a blur between sore jaws, fake I love yous, white syringes and wet cheeks.

He sat in class too lost in thought to take anything in. The thoughts were less like words or ideas and more like tv static played on a loop. Even when Patton said something to him he didn't notice. He just kept his gaze slightly downwards with his hands in his hair trying to make sense of the static.

Patton had started to worry. Remus always wore baggy clothes now a days as if to hide something. The way he rarely talked to anyone and  how empty his eyes looked reminded Pat too much of himself. Every time he wanted to talk to Remus Dee was nearby though. Only a look from his ex made Patton's brain scream to go back to being quiet and he couldn't take another step in their direction.

At the same time he couldn't help but wonder if Dee called Rem the same pet names he used to call him. Or if they kissed the same way. Or if they comforted each other from nightmares about the past before spending the entire night whispering about the future like they used to do.

One day during lunch as the couple sat away from everyone else as usual. Remus was babbling on about a movie, happy that Dee was listening to him and his interests "My favorite part is when Dr. Frank-N-Furter makes his grand entrance. He comes down an elevator..."

Decan wasn't listening. From the corner of his eye he saw Patton looking at them. He forced himself to glance back at his actual boyfriend grabbing his chin roughly and pulling him into a kiss, biting his lip and all. He looked over catching Pat's eye contact. The moment his ex looked away he stopped the kiss. He smiled hoping he had made him jealous.

"Did you want me to shut up? You could have just said so" Remus said scratching at his wrist.

"No no dear please continue talking about whatever you were rambling about" He answered absentmindedly not even looking at him as he said it.

"......Nothing....It was nothing"

We've got obsessions

I want to erase every nasty thought

That bugs me every day of every week

Remus was sitting at the desk lost in thought as he drew. Dee laid in their bed staring up as the smoke from his cigarette went up to the ceiling.

"Can you turn that off, you're giving me more of a headache than usual" He said referring to the music the other was bopping along to.

"Anaconda by Nicki Minaj is a modern masterpiece so-"

"Turn it off" He reiterated.

"Suuure" Rem groaned. "What do you listen to anyway. Probably weird indie bands who sing about fucking satan or worse, ska" He mumbled to himself.

"What're you drawing anyway?" Dee asked walking over and leaning against the desk.

Remus tensed up staring at the cigarette it wasn't until Decan snapped his fingers in front of his face he stopped staring and showed the drawing. It was a portrait of him breaking every bone in Virgil's body with a hammer. "It's based on a pleasant dream I had last night" He added with a grin.