Lost myself // yoonmin ( m.yg • BTS)

9 - what lies beneath

"From what I've seen, it isn't so much the act of asking that paralyzes us--it's what lies beneath: the fear of being vulnerable, the fear of rejection, the fear of looking needy or weak. The fear of being seen as a burdensome member of the community instead of a productive one."

Third pov

Those few times when luck is on your side truly feels like a slice of Caramel Pecan Turtle Cheesecake. Even if that luck doesn't exactly give you the best results, it accords you with yet quite satisfactory results that you are surely happy with.

You acquired what you needed, You achieved your goal and that's enough for you. But you rather become greedy and push you luck. It, no doubt, breaks in a second and you're left in confusion yet again as to what exactly you should do now. But you just tell yourself "better luck next time", not realising that you will probably forget about the solution and the situation.

Seokjin sat on his bed with elbows resting on his knees as he waited for Yoongi to shower.

They'd woken up at around 7:30 am and Yoongi was too shocked at his Hyung's presence to say anything. He couldn't quite comprehend what exactly was going. The older understood the situation and so neither of them had said a word to each other as Seokjin drove them back to the dorms.

Seokjin simply gave Yoongi a small smile before telling him to freshen up and bandage his knuckles to which Yoongi just awkwardly nodded.

Luckily none of the other members were awake yet as it was their day off. And today the first short film, 'Begin', was to be released.

Yoongi entered the room and looked much better than last night, though the dark circles and the tired look on his face remained to be visible. His damp mint-colored hair was all over his face as he dried it with a red towel. His right hand was bandaged, particularly his knuckles.

Seokjin observed the younger carefully as the younger looked anywhere but his Hyung's eyes. Yoongi didn't know what had happened yesterday after he fell asleep. He just found his hyung asleep in front of him on the rolling chair, with his studio looking like nothing had happened yesterday.

Seokjin cleared his throat sensing the tense atmosphere.

"Feel better?", He asked.

"Yeah but I was already fine just a bit tired, you know," Yoongi said still avoiding his hyung's gaze.

"Yoongi, are you really going to be that ignorant?", Seokjin said now a bit frustrated as his eyes pointed at the youngers right hand.

"Hyung...", Yoongi said turning to finally look at his hyung.

Seokjin's face softened as he saw the tired, sad, submitted look of the younger.

"I was tired and I was trying to write some lyrics but It was feeling so impossible and it's my fault, I know that," Yoongi said raising his hands in surrender.

"But you know I like to overwork myself, it satisfies me a lot but even with that I promise to take better care of myself," Yoongi finished.

Seokjin looked at the floor before he patted the space beside him for Yoongi to sit. Yoongi quietly went to sit next to the older, internally hoping that Seokjin believed him.

"I hate when you guys lie to me and think that I'll believe you so tell me, what's going on?", Seokjin asked bluntly but gently, looking straight at Yoongi.

Yoongi tried his best to not expose his crestfallen face when the older told him that he didn't believe him. He tried his best to not show any signs that indicate the older, any further, that Yoongi was, in fact, lying.