My Own MB Book, I Guess

My Thoughts On Myself

I know you guys know me for being a really nice guy who cares for you.

Unfortunately, I have to be really honest with you.

I am a goddamn liar.

I lie so many times, that I don't even care how many times I had lied.

I lied to my parents, my teachers and my friends.

Even to you guys.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

Another thing to note is that. . .

I'm aloof.

I don't give two shits about anyone anymore.

"Someone's dead? And they're someone close to me? Oh."

All the while having an emotionless face

"You wanna cut yourself? . . . . Huh."

Also an emotionless face

I guess it could be because I'm just too tired to see people getting unnecessarily suicidal or 'edgy'.

Maybe it's me. I know how many sins I had built up throughout my entire life, so I know for sure that I'm going to Hell. That's why I don't care anymore.

But. . . . Why do I still do things that make people happy?

Why do I keep trying to give people a smile on their faces?

Why does it even matter if they're happy?

Why does it matter if I'm happy?

Would they care for someone like me, who doesn't care about them and treats them like some kind of expendable tool?

Questions like these tend to ring in my head, and I would always find myself to be troubled by it.

. . . . . . . . .