Connor: 😭😭😭
Nines: what
Connor : HANK SAID HE WAS GOING TO REPLACE HIS ANDROID WITH A NEw ONE 😭😭😭
Nines: that bitch
Hank has joined the chat
Hank: FFS CONNOR I MEANT THE PHONE
and other various texts from the dbh group
Connor: Well you can be like Hank that one time at McDonald's–
Hank: Connor, I'm going stop you right there. What's Alice doing anyway?
Kara: She laid her head on my chest and said "MMMMMMMMMM warm... like a.... burger." strangest thing I've ever heard.
Hank: I feel that.
Connor: Yeah, like this one time at McDonald's –
Hank: CONNOR SHHH
Connor: like I was saying Hank was like hungover and pulled up to drive through and asked for his usual; burger, fries, you know the whole nine yards. and the person was like can I get you something else?
Connor: and you wanna know what Hank said?
Hank: I'm going to kill you Connor.
Connor: "Can you– Can you... hold me gently like a hamburger?
Hank: I did not! Slander!
Connor: yes you did and after the person said "Uh I'm not sure... What you just said." you proceeded to show the person this picture
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and pointed at it promptly and yelled LIKE THIS! LIKE THIS BURGER! I WANT TO BE HELD LIKE A BURGER DAMNIT!
Connor: and I didn't know whether to feel bad for the person or for you because the dude just kinda looked at you sadly and said, "sir, this is a McDonald's drive through. And Hank, here just drove off.
Hank: yeah.... well that was the day I learned that if no one will hold ME gently like a burger. I will hold my burger gently, thank you very much.
Connor: :-)
Hank: don't ":-)" me at least I didn't randomly say chicken nugget after I asked you what you were doing hugging sumo on the floor
Connor: :( sumo is like a chicken nugget because he is good and warm and the perfect golden boy.
Hank: noted. next time we go to McDonald's I'm going to ask for a 10 piece golden boy.
