Peace reigned for many hours after the disturbances of the night. Anna's little house held the four of them safe and oddly enough it was Benny who woke first. He lay for a moment considering what it was that had woken him for he felt like he had woken with a jump. He sighed contentedly as Frida shifted closer in her sleep. He didn't think he would ever get used to it, he knew exactly what Bjorn meant. He looked at his watch because he could not tell how light it was outside as Anna had left the shutters down and he was surprised to see that it was past 10am. He heard a noise that he couldn't identify so he got up gently so as not to disturb Frida and went to investigate. What he found was Anna in the main bathroom vomiting violently on her knees in front of the toilet. He remembered the conversations he'd had with Frida and he wet a flannel with some warm water and filled her a glass of water ready. He crouched down beside her and unpeeled her hand from the toilet , held it tightly and brushed her hair out of her face with the other then put his arm around her shoulders as she heaved. He frowned a little as he felt the sweat pouring off her but he was pleased when she squeezed his hand tightly and didn't let go. He felt her heaving slowing until it was nothing more than hiccups and he whispered calmly "Do you think you're finished little one?" She swallowed and nodded carefully so he reached for the water and held it for her while she drank the whole glass thirstily, he put the glass down and wiped her face gently with the flannel then flushed the toilet. "Can you stand?" he asked ready to help her. She nodded and whispered out of a very sore and dry throat "Can you help me? My legs feel funny" "Of course" he murmured. He stood and helped her to her feet and then held onto her while she got her bearings and when he was sure she was steady he let go and opened the mouthwash for her. "Benny I'm sorry I woke you, I'm sorry you had to deal with this. I came in here trying not to wake anyone" her throat sounded sore and she sounded sad. She gargled the mouthwash and Benny said firmly "Don't be sorry little one, I don't care that you woke me. You needed someone and today it was me. You better get used to it because we're all here now and we won't leave you. This is a team battle" Anna smiled gratefully, "I'm sorry Benny that I didn't tell you, I did it because I love you all, none of you deserve this" He pulled her into a Benny bear hug and said "I know darling and that was ok then but not now. You don't deserve this either little one but you're going to win and so am I. You're not the only one keeping secrets Anna" he sighed deeply and Anna pulled him out of the bathroom and down the stairs. "I'm sorry I can't face coffee this morning" she grumbled "tea it is then" Benny said. She gathered her tablets and her biscuits and Benny carried the tea when it was made and they took it all into the sun room. Anna sat on the sofa and covered herself with the blanket and made Benny sit next to her. He put his feet up on the coffee table and passed her a cup of tea. "Will you tell me what's wrong with you Benny?" she asked quietly. "I want to help you" Benny smiled and hugged her gently into his side "Anna darling, you already are. You all are. I need you all around me and all of this couldn't have come at a better time" he shifted a little and admitted "I'm an alcoholic Anna. I've gone back to my old ways because I couldn't handle my life as it was. I couldn't play, couldn't write anything. I drank to block it all out and could see no way to escape" Anna murmured supportively and held his hand tightly. "Mona gets in my head Anna and it's been going on since we married, she isn't kind to say the least and so I drink, I drink when I can't cope, when I can't bear to feel anymore" Anna was sad for him and said "she tells you things that make you doubt yourself? It's why you won't eat isn't it? That's why Bjorn encourages you. She says you're fat." Benny huffed with a bit of admiration, she was intuitive and clever. "Something like that Anna. I haven't played for years Mona says I'm a dirty old drunk and I can't play anymore. She says I'm a has-been and maybe I am but since this started Frida and you two have made me feel normal for the first time in decades. Bjorn says Mona gets in my head and it makes me drink. Anna I sweat for alcohol and I can't deny it but when I'm with Frida and you two I can control the cravings better. I need help to sort myself out. Bjorn says he won't let me be sent away. He says I need to work, that I need ABBA" Anna moved to wrap her arms tightly around him and said "he's right Benny, no one will send you away. Frida adores you, she always has and we will go back to work and you will write and we will do this together one day at a time. All of us." Anna made him look at her." Mona doesn't love you Benny, if she did she could never do and say such things to you. They aren't true" Benny returned the hug and said "Anna, alcohol made me do something I'll regret forever and I lost Frida because of it. What if I can't beat it and I lose her again?" Anna smiled and said "Benny, she's older and wiser. We all are. She'll fight for you, you've been so brave admitting this to all of us now and you will manage this. You have no better reason to fight than Frida. You love her and she loves you" she paused and had a sip of tea "and we love you too, it's nothing to be ashamed of" she finished her tea and nibbled at a ginger biscuit "Understandable Benny given the strain you've been under all of these years, something had to give. It doesn't make you a bad man" she shared gently. "Looks like we are both up against it then" she giggled. He chuckled and said "You've been so accepting. It's a terrible thing I've admitted too" "Benny, it is as it is. We will handle it, you're still you and we love you"
With that she got up off the sofa and said " Benny, I'm a little bit hungry, are you hungry?" "I am, should we cook? It's way past breakfast time you know" Anna was surprised and asked what the time was. Benny consulted his watch and said "nearly 11 little one" Anna's eyes went wide "I've never slept that long Benny!!" "Well, we had a disturbed night Anna and Bjorn is in your bed, he will always be able to fight your nightmares and make you safe won't he". It wasn't a question, it was merely a statement of fact and Anna blushed as she accepted what Benny said. "There's no shame in being a one man woman Anna" Benny soothed gently. Anna cleared her throat emotionally and said "it's a miracle Benny that I'll grab with both hands for as long as it lasts" "hope you're ready for eternity then, he won't leave you now Anna. He'd die first, he's wanted you back since the minute you left and he has paid heavily for his mistakes. I've seen it first hand. He's a one woman man and always has been from the second he heard you on the radio" Benny told her firmly. "We have all suffered Benny for our mistakes and stubbornness but thank you for reminding me of that. I won't leave him either and you and Frida, she tells me you're sorted. No details yet but that's for later" Anna leant forward and kissed his forehead "let's eat"
Bjorn was pulled from a deep sleep by the tantalising scents of cooking but was disoriented by the fact the room was pitch black. He then became aware that Anna was not beside him and his heart thumped with alarm. He calmed as he realised the shutters were down and it must be Anna cooking. He missed her immediately and clambered out of bed. He used the toilet and cleaned his teeth then made his way downstairs in his pajamas. What he saw in the kitchen made him smile as he spied Anna and Benny cooking and chuckling together concocting something that smelled amazing, both still in their pajamas. No sign of Frida yet though. He wandered in and kissed the top of her head gently and squeezed Benny's shoulder "Morning you two. What are you up too? It smells amazing" he asked. Anna spun round and she sparkled at him and kissed him right on the lips. "It's nearly afternoon Bjorn, we are making brunch. Leftover brunch" she said happily. He peered into the pan "What is it?" he asked. Benny chuckled and said "chopped lamb, chopped up roast potatoes, the left over veg, salt and pepper and mint sauce so far, oh and an onion." "In England they call it bubble and squeak" said Anna, "we always have it after a Sunday like yesterday and it tastes divine, it's like a hash" "never heard of it" commented Bjorn "but if it tastes as good as it smells I'll be happy" He poured himself a tea and went to lay the table. "How come you two are up?" he asked when he had finished "I was being sick in the main bathroom and woke him" Anna grimaced "I went in there trying not to wake any of you" Bjorn frowned and said "I don't care if you wake me, I WANT you to wake me" "it was your first breech night and all of you were tired" Anna argued gently. Benny stepped in "Yes but it's all ok isn't it, I was with her Bjorn, she's fine. She and I have had a heart to heart over tea and biscuits and she knows I'm a raging alcoholic" he tried to make a joke out of it "and she doesn't hate me, she's cooking for me and she didn't throw me out" Bjorn grinned and said "I'm not sure raging is right but I'm sure that it will ease with time and work that you are interested in. You and I both know you don't need it when you're with Frida or us or you're working. You just need focus and to be away from Mona" he nodded firmly as he finished his sentence. "You sure as hell don't need that poison dripping in your ears, it's no surprise you needed an outlet. This all couldn't have come at a better time. Do you need a drink now?" Bjorn asked curiously. "It's there, I can feel it but no I'm not desperate and I have it under control" Benny admitted. Anna smiled happily "That's good progress darling, well done". That dealt with for now Bjorn asked "Are you still feeling unsafe baby? The shutters are down, I didn't realise how impenetrable they are, not even a chink of light gets through." Anna shook her head and finished her tea before saying "You were all asleep and Frida still is, they would wake the dead when they come up, they are really noisy. I'll bring them up when Frida wakes. She is tired bless her" Benny was grateful for her consideration and said so. "Go and see if she's stirring Benny, she must be hungry, if she isn't we'll save her some" Bjorn said. Benny looked sideways at him and grinned, he knew damn well why Bjorn was throwing him out of the room and he commented as he left "I've seen you two hot and heavy more times than I care to remember you know, you don't have to kick me out!!" he went off up the stairs laughing his head off and Bjorn smirked at Anna's blush. He stalked towards her and trapped her against the countertop "I don't like waking up without you" he growled gently. "I like kissing you awake, I like holding you, I like cuddling with you until you don't feel sick, I love having you wrapped around me" he nibbled gently on her neck "and I love this, you owe me tonight" Anna's heart melted. "I couldn't help it Bjorn, I didn't want to wake you, you were tired baby but I don't mind owing you" she whispered. "Next time wake me" he said just before he kissed her until she was dizzy. He pulled away as he heard Benny thundering down the stairs and busied himself with plates. "She was in the toilet when I went up, I've told her to come down in her pajamas" Benny made another pot of tea while Anna doled out their brunch and asked Bjorn to get the loaf of bread out of the bread maker that she had set on automatic the day before. He did so and found the breadboard and the butter and put it in the middle of the table. "Anna I can't remember the last time I had homemade bread, my god that smells good" Bjorn thought he might just be drooling in anticipation and laughed at himself. Benny and Bjorn had settled at the table when Frida came down the stairs still looking half asleep in her pajamas. "It's still dark" she grumbled "what's the time?" Anna laughed out loud at her and told her to sit down. Anna settled next to Bjorn and pressed the button on her wristband and the shutters clattered upwards, they did make quite a noise Benny considered. It was his turn to laugh as Frida squinted her eyes at the sudden daylight "Anna left the shutters down last night darling, we've slept right through. It's very nearly noon" Frida couldn't believe how late it was and blushed as she realised she was the last one up. "God, I'm so sorry" she said "you should have woken me" Anna reached over to squeeze her hand reassuringly and said "none of us are long up Frida, this is a lovely lazy day. I may not even get out of my pajamas today" Frida hummed contently and was mollified. She ruffled Bjorn's hair affectionately and kissed Benny then said "let's eat, I'm starving and whatever it is it smells good" "It's called squeak" Bjorn told her while patting his hair back down resignedly. Frida had never got out of the habit of ruffling his hair and he thought after 50 years she was unlikely to now. He was surprised by Benny's guffaw of laughter and he lifted an eyebrow in question. Benny was out of breath as he managed "it's not called squeak, Anna said it was called bubble and squeak in England but it was like a hash. Mice squeak" Frida and Anna burst into delighted laughter and Frida gasped "Well whatever it WAS called, it'll be forever squeak now" Bjorn couldn't help his grin "Squeak it shall henceforth be" he retorted laughing. They all dug in and it was absolutely as delicious as it smelled and none of them could believe that Anna had concocted something so delicious from leftovers, they also managed to demolish a whole loaf of bread between them and nearly an entire packet of butter. Several pots of tea were drunk and much chatter was heard until finally everyone was sated. Frida and Bjorn insisted on clearing away and loading the dishwasher and Benny asked Anna if she wanted the fire lit in the living room, the way her eyes lit up told him everything he wanted to know so he set about lighting it. He made sure that Anna was settled on the sofa and had everything she needed and just as he was going out to see if Bjorn and Frida had finished they came in with a fresh pot of tea and some cups. Benny took the teapot and set it down then asked everyone what they wanted to do now. Anna piped up and said " I want to listen to Benny's piano album again, I'd like us all to sit how we used to when we were relaxing and just chilling and then I want to hear all about last week Frida and you Benny and then we'll tell you about our week" it was Frida's turn to light up as she remembered what Anna was talking about and said "Anna, that's the best idea I've heard in a long time" Frida wandered over to turn the music on and Benny said "you really like it? It's only a demo" "Darling I love it, I play it a lot. It calms my mind and helps me to focus. I listen to it at chemo. You need to release it darling and then I want you to do a stripped back ABBA album so I can take it to chemo" Anna told him. Benny's eyebrows shot up, he looked at Bjorn. Bjorn shrugged and said "she told me last week, it's a bloody good idea" Frida looked pleased as she watched Benny's face "People don't realise how intricate and clever the songs you wrote for ABBA really are. It's hidden behind us and the wall of sound" Anna tried to explain "Frida forward it to The Day Before You Came, Benny I KNOW you wrote it and played it but really listen to how beautiful it is and how beautifully you play it. Imagine a whole reimagined ABBA Undone album." Bjorn and Frida both saw Benny struggle with his self doubt as he forced himself to listen to himself playing but then he caught Anna's eyes and whatever he saw in them gave him courage as he stood and listened with his ABBA hat on. He smiled as he realised she really might have hit upon something special. "Where did this come from little one?" he asked gently "Benny, I have to be honest with you, there's a huge possibility that the chemo may have wrecked my vocal cords. I may not be able to sing properly" she held up a hand to hush the instinctive protests from the others "I will sing, I promised you all that I would but you also all promised me you wouldn't release it if I sounded anything less than I was, it may be just one last memory for us four" she smiled at all of them "I don't want you three to miss out on this chance though and this is something you can work on. I told Bjorn and Frida that they can hunt through the tapes of my voice when it was good and use them, there's unreleased stuff and all my work to go through. There's so much tech now you can make me sing even if I can't. I want to be involved even in a little way, can we settle down now?"
Benny frowned as he tried to remember what Anna meant, he looked at Bjorn who was looking equally bemused, Frida smiled as she took over and bossed them into position. The boys found themselves happily ensconced on the sofa facing each other with the girls leaning back against their chests and settled between their legs. Anna and Frida's legs were resting together and finally the boys remembered many an evening spent just like this. Benny shook his head as if he couldn't believe his luck and Bjorn acknowledged his wonder.
"Tell us what happened" Anna begged quietly and Frida gladly started the tale of their Vallentuna reconciliation.
