"What do you mean?" I was puzzled, either her words were too much to be understood or I was drowned in my own thoughts that I had no capacity to comprehend anything else.
"Well, I've got my own problems to deal with, and instead I just ran away, wiped it all out and hoped it would be gone." Her hand gestures said more than her words, and her tone of voice poured despise on her. She buried her hand in a pile of everything random to her right. "But why does this matter now. I was headed to San Diego to start fresh before you popped up in my way out of nowhere, and you seem like you need that fresh start so bad, don't you?"
She kept digging in the the mess for her hidden gem, but despite the concentration she gave her searching mission, she kept her eyes glued on the road as if her eyes were frozen in that position. A second later, she gave up. A frown crawled upon her face when her attempts ended with failure. Her eyebrows knitted themselves together as her glare grew sharper. Glimpses of fire were forming inside of her as I could tell.
"Fuck!" Her palm touched the wheel in a rather hard hit, and sooner on the wheel absorbed more of her fury as her hits became a constant action. She stopped the car right in the middle of the road, just like that, shut down in the dark. Her eyelids crinkled when her eyes were shut ever so tightly that I assumed she could see things. Her head was tilted all the way down, and she sighed in absolute annoyance. Her sigh seemed to be too long that her body let out every bit of air it once held. "I need a fucking cigarette."
As soon as she spoke, everything went back to normal, she started the car again and her head faced the road one more time.
"Alright, buckle up my lady; we be going real fast now." And with that, she pulled the gear and the car went in a speed that could take us to the moon.
********
I could never tell how or why, but not for a single moment did I feel alarmed by being in a stranger's car, going to somewhere I'd never been to before. I felt comfortable, in fact. I felt safe and I felt like I was found. It was weird to think about it; how I found serenity with a random stranger I met less than an hour ago. Perhaps it was because I didn't know much, for unknowing is better than knowing. Maybe it was just something about her that could make me feel safe, whether falsely or not, it didn't matter. I hated to admit that at some point I was willing to stick with her for the feeling she could give, it definitely was something I probably had never experienced before.
Thoughts had me drifting to complete other worlds, that I could barely feel it when the car stopped in a gas station.
"Here we are now, we're about to do something illegal. Hope you don't mind it, because that's all we can do for now." She undid her seat belt, and for the first time in forever she had her gaze settled on me as she spoke. "And I need your help. Now if you don't wanna do that, it's okay. Just let me know."
"I'm okay with it. It's not like I haven't done something like that before, I've done a lot worse." I had no idea why my confidence hinted through my words, it just did, and forced a little smirk over my face. I wasn't proud of everything Edward made me do, but it was about to be a good help. "What do you have for me?"
"You badass, love that." Her face lightened up. "Distract the cashier; left that one for you cause damn you have potential."
******
𝙍𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙚.
The cool air for the conditioning inside the little store ran over my skin once I stepped in. Theo got in first, making her way towards the cashier as the plan said.
I made my way to the cigarettes rack as soon as I got in, though my eyes never let go of Theo's figure as she walked away. She didn't return the gaze, not once. The girl knew how to cover it all.
Four packs of cigarettes were buried in the inside pocket of my leather jacket, quietly, as if it had never happened. There were security cameras all over the place, and that's why Theo was talking to the employee. His eyes shouldn't fall on the screen as long as I'm doing the business, and that was the rule, whatever happens after we leave isn't what should be worried about.
One more time, I lifted my gaze up to Theo, who seemed to be leaning over the cashier desk, letting her gentle little words put the man's mind at ease while teasing her hazel brown waves of hair. Their conversation wasn't what I could hear, though little thank you's and okay's drifted to my ears every now and then. She obviously knew what she was doing and what she was capable of doing.
Looking at her, I couldn't help but actually feel something. I knew something about her was messing around with my emotions. I'd be absolutely lying to say that it's love, I can't describe it that way. It was a brand new feeling, like wanting to be around her so bad because for some reason I felt she'd be hurt real bad, by her own self, if I weren't there to make her feel safe. It was awkward, but it was pulling me so forcefully like invisible ropes and I was too weak to resist.
From a near rack, I grabbed a bunch of chocolate bars, and a bunch of random things to keep us alive throughout the night. Tucked them in the other pocket and scanned the place one final time for anything we might need, and by that I was done with my business.
With utter silence, I made my way to the glass door. I could feel the employee's eyes falling on me for a moment, but I ignored it. Once I pulled the door open, I cleared my throat a bit too loudly as planned; a sign that we're done. I could tell she heard it, even though she bothered not to glance at me, not even for a split second. Tilted my head back to my feet and walked out, breathing that gasoline filled air again. I felt wrong, not because the little theft I was just involved in, but because she had to be in it.
