Sanders Sides One Shots: Volume 2 [COMPLETED]

Patton the Ultimate Wingman (Prinxiety, Platonic Royality, & Platonic Moxiety)

August 23rd, 2020
Requested by YourDepressoExpresso
A/N: So sorry this took so long, and I really hope that the person who requested it is still using this name so they can see it!

Patton smiled to himself as he scrolled through Facebook. He found many pictures of puppies, kittens, and other adorable baby animals that made his heart swell. It was a pleasant way to pass the time when he didn't have anything to do.

He was interrupted by a prince bursting through his door. Roman looked frazzled to say the least, his cheeks were red and his typically perfect hair was a mess. Patton blinked in surprise as he closed the door behind him and immediately sat down on his bed. The Dad-like Side scooted his wheeled desk chair around to look at him. "Uh, what's goin' on?"

"I just can't take it anymore Patton! I can't deal with Virgil!" he exclaimed. "I wish he'd just disappear! It would make my existence so much easier!"

Alarm flashed through the moral Side's mind for a brief moment, but he quickly recovered. "What did he do? He didn't steal any of your makeup, did he? Cause I told him the he needed to ask your permission before borrowing it."

"No, he didn't steal anything! Well... except he totally did! The thief stole my heart Pat! I don't know what to do!" the prince wailed pathetically.

Patton's lips formed an 'o' as he realized what was wrong. He fought back a smile as he cleared his throat. He was tempted to tell him that Virgil had been coming to him with the same problem for a couple months now, but he'd promised the anxious Side that he wouldn't say anything. Roman groaned and ran his fingers aggressively through his hair as he leaned back against the bed. 

"How long has he had it?" Patton asked, making sure his voice sounded a bit playful.

"Ugh, I don't know? I didn't realize he'd taken it!" he replied.

He fought back laughter at Roman's determination to stick with the metaphor they had constructed. He put a finger on his chin as he tried to think of the best way to address the situation. It was clear that the creative Side had no idea that Virgil had feelings for him in return. Patton had promised Virgil not to tell him anything, but that didn't mean he couldn't steer the prince in the right direction; he just needed to find the right words.

"Well, is a problem that he has it?" he said cautiously.

Roman was quiet for a moment, and then shook his head a little. "I mean, I wanted to give it to him anyway, but I don't know if he really wants it... I was so awful to him in the past, and I know we've made up since then, but I don't know if he really wants to be my friend let alone my lover."'

"I think you're worrying a little too much about your past mistakes. You did make some, I'm not going to say you didn't, but Virgil wouldn't be talking to you or joking with you or anything if he didn't want to be your friend," Patton said sincerely. The prince sighed and still looked sad. He stood up and sat down on the bed beside him. He put a hand on his thigh comfortingly. "Hey, I promise he's not still mad at you."

"You really think he's not mad?" he asked, looking up at him with a kid-like expression. He smiled and shook his head. "What should I do then? About his burglary, I mean."

Patton thought for a moment and remembered how Virgil had told him he was too scared to talk to the creative Side about his feelings. Maybe if Roman initiated the conversation, they could work it out. "Why don't you ask him for his heart?" he suggested.

"NO! No way!" Roman exclaimed, leaping up from the bed. He began to pace the room. "I can't ask for that! He'd never give it to me, and he probably doesn't want to give it to anyone!"

"Roman, you're a prince! A knight! And what do they do?" Patton asked firmly. He muttered something about saving people. "And how do they do that? With honesty, courage, and what's the last thing you need to be a hero?"

He sighed heavily. "You need bravery."

"Well, I know that you're the bravest person in the world, so I think you can do this," he said with a sweet smile. "I don't think you'll be disappointed if you do either. You trust me right? I would never lead you astray, not on purpose at least!"

Roman nodded. "Yeah, I know... thank you Padre..."

The moral Side stood up and walked over to give him a big hug. "You got this, Roman."

The prince left his room with much more confidence than he'd entered it. Patton smiled to himself with pride at what he'd done and headed back over to his computer. It was about twenty minutes later that his door opened once again. This time it was Virgil who rushed inside with flushed cheeks. "Patton, I'm going to pass out."

"Oh goodness, what happened?" he asked, feigning obliviousness.

"Well, uh, Roman- you see Roman, came up to me just now, and accused me of stealing something of his," Virgil said, beginning to pace with nervous hands. "He said I stole his heart! I- I didn't know how to respond, but then he asked if he could have mine instead!"

Patton grinned and gasped excitedly. "What did you do?"

The darkly dressed Side flushed redder. "I... I may have k-kissed him on the cheek," he mumbled. Patton let out a happy squeal and jumped up to hug him tightly. Virgil tried not to smile, but he just couldn't help it as he hugged the Dad-like Side back. "I'm so freaking happy, Pat! What the heck made him ask me that?"

"Oh, who knows?" Patton said, giggling to himself knowingly. 

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