𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙏𝙤 𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙣 - 𝙎𝙖𝙝𝙮𝙤

𝙰𝚒𝚛𝚙𝚘𝚛𝚝, 𝚌𝚘𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚊𝚢𝚋𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚗𝚞𝚝𝚜

Sana's POV

"I'm telling you, she's everything I've ever wanted" I told Momo through the phone. Momo and Dahyun were in Japan visiting Momo's family, but that wasn't an excuse for me to not tell me best friend about my girl.

"She sounds lovely, when am I going to meet her?" Momo answered through the other side of the line.

"As soon as you're back" I said, a big smile on my face.

"Can't wait. Hey, I gotta go, It's late here. Talk later?" she said.

"Time zones suck, talk later. I miss you" I said pouting.

"I miss you too" she said lastly before I hang up.

I let my body fall on my bed. I ran my hands through my hair. It was 8:00 am and my flight for Korea left in one hour. I was not ready at all.

Stress covered up my body as I thought about going back there. The memories I had with my parents certainly didn't make it easier. Although some of them were very blurry.

As I tried to remember, a stinging pain hit me in the head. I closed my eyes hard trying to make the pain leave, with no result whatsoever.

What was wrong with me? Every time I tried to think about the past, my mind would block me from doing so.

Like it never happened.

I cupped my ears with my hands as the pain didn't go away. I started having continuous flashbacks. My vision suddenly felt blurry. My legs were weak as I tried to walk to the bathroom.

I'm sorry, I don't know why I did that

You never know shit

You're right, it was a mistake

Sana, my arm, please

You're disgusting, stay away from her

I didn't know were all this voices were coming from. Some of them sounded like me, others, like people I know.

Jihyo?

I walked to my bathroom and splashed water at my face. The pain and the voices stopped. I looked at myself in the mirror with me breath accelerated and my eyes wide open.

Was I losing my mind?

I exhaled and grabbed a towel to dry my face with.

Maybe that cheap wine is fucking up my brain I thought. I should really leave alcohol, for good.

____________________

On my way to the airport, I jammed to some songs on the uber. The driver tried to start a conversation but I wasn't really feeling like it, so I put in my headphones and enjoyed the ride.

Some slow chill vibes made my head feel better. When This Boy by The Beatles was playing, my uber arrived at the airport so I took my headphones out to thank him and, obviously, payed for the ride.

When I got my luggage out of the car and watch it disappear into the traffic, my hands started sweating. Was I really ready for this? Just the thought of it terrified me.

Don't get me wrong, I love Korea. But the thought of going back terrified me. So many memories I made but couldn't remember any of them, it just made the headache come back. It was certainly tiring.

What happened to me? Where did my memories go?

It felt like my life had white spots in it, blanks, missing parts. It frustrated me the fact that I couldn't remember certain things, or having always the feeling at the back of my head that something is missing.