Elites of Seoul | Taejin ✔️

What do you want?

Seokjin's Pov:

I opened my eyes to see the balcony door of our room open, and I can see the back of Taehyung's head. He is sitting facing towards the garden.

My face feels puffy, probably from the crazy day I had yesterday. I looked at the time and notice it's almost noon. I didn't know what time I fell asleep last night.

My entire body and my inside seemed a mess. I needed a shower. Throwing the covers off me, I got out of the bed.

"Good morning," Taehyung said as he walked into the room. I guess he had heard me getting out of bed.

"Morning," I whispered out and walked past him. I wasn't in the mood to talk or deal with him.

"I made breakfast."

"I'm not hungry." I let out and continued my way towards the bathroom.

If that was his way of apologizing to me, it was not going to work. We are not going to sweep away everything that happened last night like it's nonexistent and pretend to be happy today. I'm not doing it.

I'm not happy right now, and I refuse to fake it with him.

Stripping out of my shirt and looked at myself in the mirror, I wonder if that man knew how fortunate he was. I know I wasn't born rich, but he sure as hell won when he got me.

"You are still mad at me, aren't you?" Taehyung said, appearing at the bathroom door and looking at me through the mirror.

"What do you think, Taehyung?" I slept and woke up, and everything is okay?

"I think you are still mad at me."

"Yes, I'm angry with you. You went too far last night, and as usual, you wanted to have the final say in everything, I hate it. Do you know how it feels to wake up and feel empty? I felt so suffocated last night, I-" realizing I was about to cry. I gathered myself and walked into the shower, closing the door behind me.

I couldn't control the tears that began to flow as I turned on the shower. I had promised myself that I would never put myself through something like this again, yet here I am.

The shower doors open, and I feel the cold air on my body that soon disappears as Taehyung closes the door.

I didn't need to open my eyes to know it's him. I allowed the water to flow over my body and wash away my tears.

He wraps his arms around me and pulls me to him. "I'm sorry. I know I keep saying it, but I am Jin. You are right; I was too much last night. I felt like you wanted to leave me, and I didn't know what to do.

I don't want you to feel suffocated or empty. We just got married, and I don't want us to be like my parents. I don't want us to appear happy when we indeed aren't.

I want us to be happy, and I want us to love each other, not pretend that we do. I asked you to marry me because I genuinely love you, and you make me happy, but I fear you are not happy being with me a-anymore." 

I turn in his arms to face him, looking up at the man I married, wondering if he truly knew how much I love him.

"Can I shower alone, and then we talk about this?" Everything in me wanted to hug him and comfort him, but I didn't. I want him to understand that personal space is important to me even if I am his husband, and everything is not on his time.

I need time to process things, and I need him to respect that.

He looks at me as though he is taken back by my words and releases his hold on me. "Okay. I will be in the room," he says and walks out of the shower.

Once the door his closed, I leaned my head against the shower walls and cried quietly to myself. I was angry with my husband, and at the same time, I was worried about a lot of things. I was wrong for not telling him about Jungkook, but some things are hard to explain even to the ones you love.

*****

"Okay, I am ready to talk," I said to Taehyung as I sat on the sofa in the bedroom. He was sitting on the bed, typing away on his laptop.

"I booked a trip for us." He said, closing his laptop and placing it on the bed.

"I am sorry you did what?" Wait, I am perplexed here.

"We need some time away together."

I took a deep breath and rubbed my hand over my face; I was honestly a bit annoyed. "Taehyung, I need you to pause for a moment. A trip is not going to fix anything here. There are real issues we are facing that you are not paying attention to."

"Then what will fix it? Tell me, I will do it, and I will pay for anything that's needed to fix what's going on with us. Is it counseling? My parents did counseling when they were on the verge of getting divorced, and it worked, we can have counseling."

"Taehyung, let's remove money from the equation for now as well as your parents and what they did and what worked for them. How about you tell me what is it you want from me as your husband and I will do the same? I think our biggest issue is communication among some other things, but why don't we start step by step with hearing each other out."

I feel like the only way we are going to get anywhere today is me going into teacher mode. My husband believes money can solve and make things better, and in my world, it does not work that way.

"Okay, for me, I want you to be my biggest supporter. I know my life versus the life you are used is very different, and I know it can be tiresome, but I need you to be there with me and go through it with me. Jin, so many people, had screwed me over in my life, some of the closest people to me, even before I met Yoongi and Jungkook, I have had people come into my life just because of who I am or who my parents are.

I don't always have real and honest people around me. When I chose you to be my husband, it is because I felt as though I found the person I could trust to bring into my personal world, the world no one has ever gotten into. I want you to be the person I trust the most out of anyone else, and you should be that person. I don't ever want to have to doubt you or your love for me.

This is one of the reasons why I kept the fact that I knew about Jungkook and you hidden, because I wanted to see if you would disclose it to me.

I want you to be able to trust me as your husband and trust me to lead. Somethings I'm not trying to be controlling with, I have a reason for it, and maybe if I explain it to you, then you'll understand. My world is cruel Seokjin, I don't want you getting hurt on the outside, but I need you to put away being stubborn and believe that I have your best interest at heart and don't look at it as me always trying to control you.

Another thing I need is for you to start embracing me, our home, our business, and everything that was once mine. When we got married, there was no prenup. I married you because of love, Seokjin! You don't acknowledge this home like yours; you come off as though this a place of temporary stay.

If you are not comfortable in this home, tell me, we will move to a home that makes you comfortable. Somethings I can compromise on, especially if it will make you happy.

I came into your life, and I embrace most things, I speak to your brother almost every day. I talk to your parents everyday. I do a lot of work on my end Seokjin, but I feel you don't accept me as me.

I hate that it's so easy for you to want to quit this. You say it so freely that it makes me wonder, do you love me? And when I have those moments, I go through something. For example,
like last night, I hurt you, and I didn't mean to, but I went into a panic.

I want to know that you are willing to go through things with me and not be a quitter. I do not believe in divorce Seokjin, I believe in working things out."

I was honestly taken back; I did not expect him to have so many things to say.

*******
A/N: I guess the next chapter, we will hear what Seokjin's wants.