Elites of Seoul | Taejin ✔️

Empty

Taehyung's Pov:

I sat on my bed, gazing at our wedding picture in tears, how could I call our marriage a mistake, it was not a mistake. I have never loved anyone as much as I love Seokjin, but he drives me insane. I can't do this anymore; my whole life has been out there for him; there is nothing he does not know about me.

I came into this clean, everything on the table, but every day with him is something new, I don't know how to deal with it anymore. How can he even have second thoughts if he wants to keep our baby or not? That's our child, our baby, I am his husband!

I wish someone would've told me marriage was this hard, or that heartache really exists. A significant part of me wants to leave and never look back, but as I sit and look at our picture, I can't find it in me to go. I don't want our marriage to end; I only want all of this to end. I don't know how to fix this, I thought taking the Jeon's to court and him getting justice would end this, but even as I work on the case with our attorney's he seems so removed. It makes me mad, and I tell myself that it has got to be harder for him as he experienced this, not me, but I am trying my best, I have been giving my best.

Our marriage has become so empty, and I feel like we are mourning the loss of someone. This house now feels so desolate and gloomy, I have never been depressed before, but slowly I can feel myself getting there. This is a lot to consume, and I am trying, I truly am for the sake of our marriage, but you can't be so cold that you want to take away the only thing we have ever created together.

Yes, I threw away his pills, but I wouldn't have done that had he been forthcoming with me. A lot of things I would not have done if there weren't broken trust in our marriage. I am always the one who is pushing to fix us, but I don't know if I have it in me anymore, not if he wants to abort our baby, I don't think I would be able to forgive him for that.

I understand his scars to the degree that I can. But I am human too, and I have feelings also, there are things that I want. I dropped the photo on the bed and slid to the floor, letting more tears to fall, I didn't know what to do. One part of me wanted to go, but the other part didn't want me to go.

My heart felt heavy, it's like the world was resting on my shoulders, and I didn't know what to do, money, my status, none of it couldn't rid me from what I was feeling. I don't know if he loves me as much as I love him. It's always so easy for him to tell me no, and push me away, but why is it so hard for me to give up on us? Why am I like this? Why can't he realize that there is nothing in the world, I wouldn't do for him for us?

"WHY?!" I screamed out in tears, banging my head against the bed. The sounding of the doorbell was starting to drive me mad, it was going off non-stop and so was my phone. I got up from the floor, wiping my tears to look at the phone, it was Jungkook.

I cursed to myself as I forgot he was coming over, now was not the time for him to be here. I needed to find Jin; I need to stop him from opening the door and letting Jungkook in. We need to deal with us first before we spoke to Jungkook. I also want to tell him I didn't mean it, I don't want our marriage to end, but I don't want him to get rid of our baby either.

Ignoring the bell, I rush out of the room to find Jin. I kept calling his name, but he was ignoring me, but then I remembered I left him in the bathroom, I didn't hear the door or see him go, although he could've left through the other entrance to the hallway. I was almost to the stairs when I decided to turn back to check the bathroom.

I knocked on the door and called out to him, but no answer, "Jin, I am sorry, can we talk?" I waited for a while, but he didn't answer me. I pushed the door open, losing my balance, and falling to my knees at the scene before me. "Jin! Jin! Seokjin!" I shook him hard as his wrist covered in blood and pool of blood settled beneath it.

My hands began shaking as I checked for his pulse, I felt something, but I didn't know if it was my own or his. Getting off the floor, I hurried to our room and grabbed my phone, and ran back to the bathroom, calling our doctor and requesting he comes by urgently.

I couldn't call for an ambulance. This would not end well if I did.

Sinking to the floor, I pulled him into my arms and hugged him tightly. I could tell he was still breathing, and that gave me hope. I held him in arms, praying the doctor would get here quickly, vowing never to let him go. I won't ever forgive myself if something happens to him.

Before I felt heavy and confused, but now I felt empty, it was as if my world was filled with a shear of nothingness. I couldn't cry anymore, and the minutes felt like hours, the wall was caving in on us, and I didn't know what to do, the only thing I know was that I couldn't lose the person I love the most in this entire world.