Noyade | Rabastan Lestrange [2] ✔︎

38 | STRONG BELIEFS

It was needless to say that Phoenix barely slept that night. She tossed and turned, unable to shake that bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. Thankfully Maureen seemed to have decided to believe in her vision after all and was sensible enough not to ask questions when she saw the bags under her best friend's eyes.

When they sat at breakfast, both barely eating anything, Phoenix kept nervously checking the door for any sign of Rabastan. Although she had had plenty of time throughout the night to think about whether she wanted to burden him with the knowledge of her vision, she still hadn't come to any conclusion.

Overall breakfast was an uneasy situation. Dumbledore had refrained from punishing her for her outbreak of anger - for whatever reason - but she still didn't dare look at the headmaster. She was disgusted of him. How could he do anything in his power when it came to Muggle-borns but refuse to help Jack – one of his teachers?

After minutes of silence Maureen cleared her throat and hesitantly informed her, "I told Dawn we'd meet up some other time. Maybe the next Hogsmead weekend or during Summer break. I thought you might have your mind elsewhere. She hasn't responded yet, but I'm sure she'll be fine with it."

Phoenix shook her head. "No, if she needs us, I'm totally up for it."

"So, you don't hate her for being a blood traitor?" Maureen asked, which made Phoenix look at her in surprise.

"Why would you ever think that? The situation with Dawn and Sirius... it's different from others. They might associate with the likes of Lily Evans, but they're not bad people, not yet anyway. There's a great difference in that and how Dumbledore seems to have forgotten where he belongs."

All of a sudden Maureen stuck the Daily Prophet out towards her. "Do you still want to read it?"

"It can't hurt, I guess," Phoenix answered flatly, taking the paper and opening it.

She didn't put too much thought into the headlines she read about destruction and attacks. They seemed to be the same every single day. In truth, there wasn't much else to tell. Whether it was right or wrong to go against those with stained blood, there was pain all around them. However, the more she considered all that had happened, she couldn't help but feel like her parents had been right all along. Crystal Morgan was a Muggle-born, Jack was in this desperate situation because of his love to a beast, Sirius and Dawn had been cast out because they associated with those whose ancestors had tortured theirs hundreds of years earlier and Dumbledore wanted to change their world completely in favour of the Muggle-born. It all lead back to them.

"It's just that your family's beliefs are most likely the strongest among all the other Pure-blood families and it's completely natural if you share them. I mean they're your family, the ones who raised you. I just don't want you to trust blindly without considering your own loyalties - like friends," Maureen explained, warming her hands on her coffee. She seemed honestly concerned, but not in the least judging.

Phoenix nodded, turning the page to the names of the dead and missing, although she didn't expect to find anything new that morning. Jack had already been listed missing a few days earlier. "Sometimes I don't know what to believe, to be honest."

"I'd say believe in your gut feeling, but that's most likely the worst advice ever, isn't it?" Maureen grinned tiredly.

A flat chuckle escaped Phoenix lips. "How about I just trust you to tell me, if I ever turn into one of those blind followers? I'm afraid Reg already-"

Phoenix' throat clenched and she felt cold all of a sudden. The other part of her sentence got stuck in her throat, as her eyes scanned one of the names times and times again. Jackson Avery. It didn't change. There was the name of her instructor, her friend, her fiancé, on a list of people that had died during the last day. Her mind was completely blank for a moment, not even a single thought crossing it. This wasn't possible. Not Jack, not the person who had always known a way out of a certain situation. She had just seen him alive in her vision the night before. He couldn't just have been ripped away like that.

When Maureen's voice pulled her back into reality, she felt like she had been slapped. "Nix, are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Phoenix lied. Her voice sounded far away, like it belonged to a different person, and she slowly rose to her feet. "I just... I need to find Rabastan."

She walked out of the Great Hall, ignoring her friends' shout and not noticing whatever happened as she did so. Not Jack Avery.

As soon as she reached the staircase, she broke into a run. If Rabastan had seen it already, she knew exactly where he was. He always went there, if something bothered him. He had done it for almost seven years. Her feet moved by themselves and she didn't even feel the burning in her lungs or muscles as she ran up the stairs and through the corridors of the seventh floor. Jackson Avery. His name was branded into her eyelids and she saw them every time she blinked. She didn't feel like crying. It couldn't be real.

When she finally reached the end of the staircase to the Astronomy Tower, she found the door open. At first she didn't see Rabastan, but the she spotted his frame near the railing, his shoulders hanging low and a copy of the Daily Prophet clenched in his left hand. He had seen it already.

"Rabastan?" she asked, her voice quivering against her will.

The boy with nearly white hair, slowly turned around. His icy blue eyes were fixed at her, but they didn't glim with excitement or anger as they usually did. They were red and filled with sorrow. His cheeks were glistening with tears and his hair looked like he had pulled on it in frustration, standing up in every possible direction. He looked like a hurt puppy and it made Phoenix' stomach turn in realisation. All of it was real.

She crossed the roof with fast-paced steps and slung her arms around his waist. It only took him a second to close his arms around her, his head finding her neck. She felt his body shake against hers and felt his back tense under her hands with every sob. She placed her head against his shoulder, a silent tear rolling down her cheek.

Jack Avery was gone.