Noyade | Rabastan Lestrange [2] ✔︎

{ Acknowledgements }

15/07/2020

One out of four people suffers from a mental disorder.

About fifty percent of severe cases go undiagnosed or untreated.

I can't say that I've ever battled a mental disorder. However, like Rabastan and Phoenix - and maybe even Sirius, Dawn and Regulus as well - I often struggle with the urge to prove myself. Often times I don't think I'm good enough. Sometimes a single sentence can make me feel like I am a failure, the odd one out in my family or that anyone in my life would deserve better. As soon as I get to my room I'd break down crying, hating who I am and wishing that I could be different. 

But I can't. I'm me and maybe that's totally fine.

For me, those phases usually turn up when I'm stressed out and I'm generally fine, but for other people, every single day is a battle. I've seen such cases in my family and in people I know and that's what made me turn this story into a story about mental illness. Because out there are people who are fighting a battle nobody else can even guess at. For some even getting out of bed in the morning is impossible and even today there are people who think that mental illness is a choice.

But it's not.

Why would anyone choose to be hurting that way? Well, the problem is that we can't see how and why people like Rabastan are hurting, while we can see an x-ray of a broken bone. While the discussion about mental illness is slowly coming up, there is still so much we don't know about. But like a lot of other things, it is a topic that we should talk about and educate ourselves. 

Because people who are struggling should be able to talk about what they're going through, just like they're loved ones should as well. The loved ones are suffering too. It hurts to see somebody you love in pain and not being able to do anything about it. I don't think my story will accomplish anything but I still wanted to point out that we have to get rid of the stigma and talk about mental illness. Please, if you suffer, talk to somebody about it when you're ready - even if it's just me. My inbox is always open if anyone would like to talk. Because as I wrote this small text I realised that sometimes it helps a lot just to get things off of one's chest, even if a virtual listener might not be able to do anything about it. So, don't be shy. I might not be able to help, but I can always listen.

It's actually funny how this turned into a story about mental illness when all I wanted was to show that a lot of what happens to us in our lives turns us into who we are today. While we only knew that Rabastan Lestrange was one of the Death Eaters who tortured Neville's parents, there might have been something that turned him into the evil man he was at the time, even if that doesn't justify his actions. Every single person has their own story and they can't simply be judged by one fact. I believe that no Death Eater was born evil, but maybe life made them become wicked. 

Be mindful about how you treat people because even words can have a huge effect.

And most of all, take care of yourself.

★

Thank you

Wow, I can't believe that the story of 2.5 years has come to an end. It's been a few days since I've finished the epilogue and it feels weird not to think about what's going to happen with Phoenix in the next chapters. While this was once an experiment to figure out if I'd be able to write in a foreign language, those characters have really grown on me and a little more than a week ago I cursed myself for planning that Phoenix would die at the end when I first started writing in December 2017.

I don't think I'd have finished this story if it hadn't been for all of you. Especially recently I've received so much feedback and I can't even thank you enough to match what every single comment and vote means to me. It's hard to pick people to thank but there are a few people I want to have my special thanks:

 : Thank you for listening to my rambling about Phoenix and her friends for 2.5 years. You never once complained and always helped me even if you weren't up to date with reading the chapters. I love our writing-talks and I'll gladly listen to your ideas for your stories because you and your mind are just amazing!

fallingnorth : I still can't get over how you manage to make my heart explode with just a single sentence every now and then. Your support means the world to me and I can't thank you enough!

Pink_Unicorn_22 : Thank you for your advice although you never even read a page of my story and only one chapter of 'Philosopher's Stone'. You were always so excited to help even though you didn't care about the fandom or knew anything about what I was talking about.

I'd also like to mention my boyfriend who isn't on Wattpad, but he showed so much interest in my story and even got so excited when we watched the Harry Potter films. You're the absolute best!

And of course a huge thanks to every single one of you who read my story and voted and commented. It really means a lot and you're most likely the main reason I managed to finish this story (which is the first story I actually finished).

★

See you

Again, thank you so so much. I'll most likely not post a new story for a little bit but I'm working on two new projects, which may or may not be published here in the future. One is little Elle Black's story and then there's an original dystopian novel I just started working on.

Still, I'd always love to hear from you in my private messages if you'd like to chat for a bit. I love you. Take care of yourself.

Enya